Doug Larson

Doug Larson wrote a daily column for the Green Bay Press-Gazette and a weekly column for the Door County Advocate

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A child is a person who can't understand why someone would give away a perfectly good kitten.Rate it:
A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience.Rate it:
Accomplishing the impossible means only that the boss will add it to your regular duties.Rate it:
Accomplishing the impossible means only the boss will add it to your regular duties.Rate it:
An optimist thinks this is the best of all worlds. A pessimist fears the same may be true.Rate it:
Few things are more satisfying than seeing your own children have teenagers of their own.Rate it:
Home computers are being called upon to perform many new functions, including the consumption of homework formerly eaten by the dog.Rate it:
If all the cars in the United States were placed end to end, it would probably be Labor Day Weekend.Rate it:
If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles.Rate it:
If the English language made any sense, a catastrophe would be an apostrophe with fur.Rate it:
If the English language made any sense, lackadaisical would have something to do with a shortage of flowers.Rate it:
Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks.Rate it:
More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the better comes after the worse.Rate it:
Some of the world's greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enought to know they were impossible.Rate it:
The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball.Rate it:
The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it.Rate it:
The reason people blame things on the previous generations is that there's only one other choice.Rate it:
The surprising thing about young fools is how many survive to become old fools.Rate it:
There are worse things than getting a call for the wrong number at 4 AM. It could be the right number.Rate it:
Utility is when you have one telephone, luxury is when you have two, opulence is when you have three - and paradise is when you have none.Rate it:
What some people mistake for the high cost of living is really the cost of high living.Rate it:

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