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James Thurber

United States humorist and cartoonist who published collections of essays and stories (1894-1961)

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A husband should not insult his wife publicly, at parties. He should insult her in the privacy of the home.
All human beings should try to learn before they die what they are running from, and to, and why.
Early to rise and early to bed makes a male healthy and wealthy and dead.
Early to rise and early to bed Makes a male healthy, wealthy and dead
He knows all about art, but he doesn't know what he likes.
He who hesitates is sometimes saved.
Her own mother lived the latter years of her life in the horrible suspicion that electricity was dripping invisibly all over the house.
Human Dignity has gleamed only now and then and here and there, in lonely splendor, throughout the ages, a hope of the better men, never an achievement of the majority.
Humor is emotional chaos remembered in tranquility.
I do not have a psychiatrist and I do not want one, for the simple reason that if he listened to me long enough, he might become disturbed.
I hate women because they always know where things are.
I loathe the expression "What makes him tick." It is the American mind, looking for simple and singular solution, that uses the foolish expression. A person not only ticks, he also chimes and strikes the hour, falls and breaks and has to be put together again, and sometimes stops like an electric clock in a thunderstorm.
I loathe the expression What makes him tick. It is the American mind, looking for simple and singular solution, that uses the foolish expression. A person not only ticks, he also chimes and strikes the hour, falls and breaks and has to be put together again, and sometimes stops like an electric clock in a thunderstorm.
I used to wake up at 4 A.M. and start sneezing, sometimes for five hours. I tried to find out what sort of allergy I had but finally came to the conclusion that it must be an allergy to consciousness.
It had only one fault. It was kind of lousy.
It is better to know some of the questions than all of the answers.
Its better to know some of the questions, than all of the answers.
Let us not look back in anger, or forward in fear, but around us in awareness.
Nowadays men lead lives of noisy desperation.
The only rules comedy can tolerate are those of taste, and the only limitations those of libel.
The wit makes fun of other persons the satirist makes fun of the world the humorist makes fun of himself, but in so doing, he identifies himself with people--that is, people everywhere, not for the purpose of taking them apart, but simply revealing their true nature.
The wit makes fun of other persons the satirist makes fun of the world the humorist makes fun of himself.
The wit makes fun of other persons; the satirist makes fun of the world; the humorist makes fun of himself, but in so doing, he identifies himself with people--that is, people everywhere, not for the purpose of taking them apart, but simply revealing their true nature.
There are two kinds of light -- the glow that illumines, and the glare that obscures.
There are two kinds of light--the glow that illuminates, and the glare that obscures.
There is no safety in numbers, or in anything else.
Why do you have to be a nonconformist like everybody else?

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