Big G 
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Dr. Miller: Want Sex? Brush your teeth
Dan Parker: Calm down buddy, life is short.
Cindy Parker: Girls, your father needs you now.
Chelsea Parker: But Daddy, water isn't a food it's a drink!
Dan Parker: Or is it?
Dan Parker: ICE!
Dan Parker: My name is Dan Parker, and I have... gingivitis.
Chelsea: I had a dream about daddy that he was chasing me and he bit off my leg.