Bill Reimers:
And, the moment we've all been waiting for... 313 pounds.

Chris Lecce:
313 pounds?!

Bill Reimers:
I would imagine that's fully clothed.

Chris Lecce:
Oh my God, she could be the house! I hate this job!

Bill Reimers:
To protect and to serve.

Chris Lecce:
Ooo, I love my job, I love it so much!

Bill Reimers:
But I would appreciate it if you would not act like a walking hard-on while we're on the job.

Chris Lecce:
Succinctly put.

Richard "Stick" Montgomery:
Isn't love great, Chris? One minute you're a god, the next minute you're a scum-suckin' pig.