High Aldwin:
Magic is the bloodstream of the universe.

Willow:
See this acorn? I'll throw it at you and turn you to stone!

Madmartigan:
Ooh, I'm really scared. Help! There's a peck with an acorn pointed at me!

Willow:
Don't call me a peck!

Madmartigan:
Oh I'm sorry! Peck! Peck! Peck, peck, peck, peck, peck!

Willow:
What are you doing?

Madmartigan:
I found some blackroot. She loves it.

Willow:
Blackroot? I'm the father of two children. You never, ever give a baby blackroot.

Madmartigan:
Well my mother raised me on blackroot. It's good for you. It put's hair on your chest, doesn't it, Sticks?

Willow:
Her name is not Sticks! She's Alora Dannen, the future empress of Tir Asleen and the last thing she's gonna want is a hairy chest!

Sorsha:
What are you looking at?

Madmartigan:
Your leg. I'd like to break it.

Madmartigan:
I love you Sorsha!

Sorsha:
Stop saying that!

Madmartigan:
What happened back there?

Willow:
You started spouting poetry. "I love you Sorsha! I worship you Sorsha!" You almost got us killed!

Madmartigan:
"I love you Sorsha?" I don't love her, she kicked me in the face! I hate her... Don't I?

Sorsha:
What happened to "You are my sun, my moon, my starlit sky"?

Madmartigan:
It went away.

Sorsha:
"I dwell in darkness without you," and it *went away*?

Willow:
I've sent her... I've sent her to a realm where evil cannot harm her!

Bavmorda:
That's impossible! There's no such place!

Franjean:
You are drunk, and when you are drunk you forget that I am in charge!

Rool:
Fine, then which way should we go?

Fin Raziel:
W-w-i-l-l-o-w! You i-i-i-i-d-iot!

Franjean:
Don't I know you? I stole the baby from you while you were taking a peepee!

Madmartigan:
What are you going to look like if this works?

Fin Raziel:
Don't interrupt.

Madmartigan:
Sorry.

Fin Raziel:
I'm a young beautiful woman.

Madmartigan:
Concentrate, Willow!

Rool:
You are so beautiful! Your eyes! Your whiskers! I must kiss you!

Franjean:
Stupid dikini.

Fin Raziel:
I have Cherlindrea's wand, Bavmorda!

Rool:
Thats Raziel?

Franjean:
I don't know, I expected something more grand, less...

Rool:
Fuzzy.

Franjean:
Fuzzy.

Rool:
We'll never catch up with those horses!

Franjean:
Then we will have to track them.

Rool:
That would take forever. Besides, even if we found them, they'd capture us, stick us in cages, torture us and then finally devour us!

Franjean:
Are you suggesting we go home?

Rool:
Nah, this is more fun.

Franjean:
All right, fine then. Come on!

Willow:
Don't feed black-root to the baby!

Willow:
Here are her changing rags and her milk bladder.

Madmartigan:
Any milk in there?

Willow:
It's for her!

Madmartigan:
I wouldn't steal from a baby. You worry too much, Peck.

Meegosh:
It's Willow!

Madmartigan:
That's magic? It smells terrible.

Willow:
It's the life spark. It forms...

Madmartigan:
Well it stinks! This whole thing stinks!

Willow:
We need your help!

Madmartigan:
My help? Why? You're a sorcerer.

Willow:
You're a warrior and a swordsman. And you're 10 times bigger than I am, Stupid!

Willow:
Madmartigan, you never, ever drive that fast with an infant!

Madmartigan:
I just saved that infant's life!

Madmartigan:
Let me out of here, Airk. Give me a sword, I'll win this war for you.

Airk:
I still serve Galadorn, you serve no one. Remember? Just sit in your coffin and rot.

Madmartigan:
I'll be around long after you're dead! When I get out of here, I'm gonna cut your head off and stick it on a pig pole!

Madmartigan:
Well, looks like I got you here.

Franjean:
You? What did you do?

Rool:
All you did was hang around and eat our eggs.

Willow:
We found one of your babies in our village. Will you please take care of her?

Airk:
We're in battle, little ones. Find a woman to take care of her.

Madmartigan:
We thought you were a woman, Airk!

Willow:
Burglekutt, you're troll dung!

Madmartigan:
Don't let him talk to you that way, Burglekutt!

Franjean:
Don't play with that wand! It holds vast powers. Only a real sorcerer can use it, not a stupid peck like you.

Willow:
I found a boat. We're all set.

Madmartigan:
Good. Take these two lizards out and drown them.

Rool:
Lizards? Who you calling lizards? Grrr! Grrr! Your mother was a lizard!

Rool:
Rats! Big rats!

Franjean:
What? What? Oh, Rool, you and your stupid rat dreams.

Willow:
Burglekutt, I'm gonna...

Burgelcutt:
You're gonna what?

Burgelcutt:
AH HA HA HA HA!

Willow:
Some day, Burglekutt! Some day!

Madmartigan:
Mumbo, Jumbo, I am hungry. Go get me some eggs or something.

Franjean:
We are not afraid of you!

Madmartigan:
NOW!

Cherlindrea:
Elora Danan must survive. She must fulfill her destiny and destroy Queen Bavmorda. Her power grows like an evil plague. Unless she is stopped, Bavmorda will control the lives of your village, your children, everyone. All creatures of good heart need your help, Willow. The choice is yours.

Madmartigan:
Let me do that. Get away, rodents!

Franjean:
Take your hand off that! You leave that alone you stupid, fat Diakini!

High Aldwin:
I will consult the bones!

Madmartigan:
Gentlemen, meet Lug.

Airk:
Well, ha ha ha! Madmartigan. What'd you do this time?

Madmartigan:
Nothing you wouldn't have done in my place.

Airk:
I always knew you'd end up in a crow's cage.

Madmartigan:
Well at least I'm not down there herding sheep.

Willow:
What's that?

Madmartigan:
Smells like a battle.

Willow:
I suppose you're a warrior.

Madmartigan:
I am the greatest swordsman that ever lived. Say, um, can I have some of that water?

Madmartigan:
Burglekutt, let me out of here. I'll take care of the baby, I swear. Just let me out of here... Please. Vohnkar, let me borrow that spear just for a minute. Well... Well at least give me some water. Burglekutt, don't leave me alone here with these two! UHH! Well that was really stupid, Peck.