Richard Levy:
Congratulations. You're actually drinking, driving, smoking, leering and groping at the same time.

Richard Levy the Shameless:
Which on one hand, is just about the coolest thing ever...

Richard Levy the Shameless:
...but on the other hand, maybe isn't so great for the image.

Pete:
Heaven is just a mouse click away.

Pete:
Guard your carnal treasure.

Pete:
Tad Hamilton is an actor. How do you know he's not acting with you?

Tad:
Yeah, Pete told me if I ever hurt you; that he would tear me to pieces with his bare hands or with his rhetoric.

Rosalee:
Pete told you if you hurt me, he would tear you to pieces with his bare hands or with his rhetoric? That is so... adorable.

Rosalee:
Yikes-a-bee

Rosalee:
You have five smiles Pete. One when you think someone an idiot. One when you think someone's REALLY an idiot. One when you're singing to Barry White. One when you're getting all dressed up. And one when you're looking at me.

Angelica:
Well is it love, big love, or great love?

Pete:
What do you mean?

Angelica:
Well, love you get over in two months, big love you get over in two years, and great love, well great love... changes your life. So which one is it?

Angelica:
Oh my god, it's great love.

Pete:
Yeah, that just great.

Angelica:
Rosalee, when great love is rejected something in a man dies.

Pete:
Rosie, there something I want to ask you...

Pete:
What is the worst thing that could happen to me right now?

Pete:
Angelica?

Angelica:
Yes, Pete, what is the object of your desire?

Pete:
Um... we'd like another round of beers.

Angelica:
Someday Pete, when I ask what you desire you will say: you, Angelica, *you* are the object of my desires.

Pete:
Okay.

Pete:
I think we'll just take the beers for now.

Angelica:
Well you got to win her back.

Pete:
Believe me I have tried everything.

Angelica:
Well what did she say, when you told her you loved her?

Pete:
Ok maybe not everything.

Angelica:
How did she react, when you kissed her?

Pete:
Ok, maybe only two things.

Rosalee:
(to Tad) Do you think it is possible to love someone your entire life and never realize it?

Rosalee:
What did you want to ask me?

Pete:
Oh it was nothing, it was nothing really. No, wait a minute, I remember what I was going to say. (Pete kisses Rosie) Rosie, I'm in love with you.

Pete:
I got you something.

Pete:
You know, in case you don't want the prime rib in first class.

Rosalee:
You got a call at this hour? From who? A racoon?

Tad:
Give me a break, I just lost my wife and my goat.

Henry:
Sometimes Goliath kicks the shit out of David. It's just nobody bothers to tell that story.