Perfect Friday

Lord Nicholas "Nick" Dorset:
Are you Graham?

Mr. Graham:
Yes.

Lord Nicholas "Nick" Dorset:
What do you want?

Mr. Graham:
I'd like to escape, I imagine we both would.

Lord Nicholas "Nick" Dorset:
I'm perfectly fine.

Mr. Graham:
You have no money.

Lord Nicholas "Nick" Dorset:
Have you?

Mr. Graham:
I intend getting some.

Lord Nicholas "Nick" Dorset:
What a dreadful tie.

Mr. Graham:
A present from an admirer [his wife] .

Lady Britt Dorset:
Ooh Mr Graham, I'm quite frightened to come and see you again.

Mr. Graham:
What's the trouble?

Lady Britt Dorset:
Money trouble.

Lady Britt Dorset:
I must be absolutely your most troublesome customer Mr Graham.

Lady Britt Dorset:
My father is very strict, he always tell me that my husband should provide for me.

Mr. Graham:
And he doesn't?

Lady Britt Dorset:
Nick is absoultey generous when he has money but that's not exactly very often.

Mr. Graham:
I see, do you mind [smoking]... you must learn to live within your means.

Lady Britt Dorset:
I do but money's for spending.

Mr. Graham:
It is if you have it.

Lady Britt Dorset:
You aren't angry at me Mr Graham, for asking for the extra ?100?

Mr. Graham:
You aren't angry with me for refusing it are you?

Nanny:
It's been cut off.

Lady Britt Dorset:
Telephone company's absolutely irresponsible.

Mr. Graham:
You spent the ?500 on this [convertible car] .

Lady Britt Dorset:
Oh no, the deposit was only ?200, I had to buy some new clothes - do you like my suit?

Lady Britt Dorset:
Oh Mr Graham, you are the kindest bank manager.

Mr. Graham:
Deputy bank manager.

Lady Britt Dorset:
Well whatever, not to be angry.

Mr. Graham:
You've planned this. [Starts to laugh] .

Lady Britt Dorset:
You've very kind when you laugh, as a reward you shall have a drive in my car.

Mr. Graham:
Your car?

Lady Britt Dorset:
Our car. Come along and you shall take me to dinner.

Mr. Graham:
I can't afford it.

Lady Britt Dorset:
A picnic.

Lady Britt Dorset:
Mr Graham, you're the first kind man I've met.

Mr. Graham:
Then wouldn't it be more flattering to call me by my Christian name?

Lady Britt Dorset:
I like Mr Graham, it sounds like you - kind and reliable.

Lady Britt Dorset:
You see all my boyfriends have been super-attractive but absolute bastards. I don't think a man can keep me if I'm very sure of him. Do you Mr Graham?

Mr. Graham:
The children of broken marriages are often unsettled, maybe that's your problem.

Lady Britt Dorset:
My parents are devoted.

Mr. Graham:
This morning you told me they were divorced, or is that only when you need an overdraft?

Lady Britt Dorset:
You've got me Mr Graham.

Mr. Graham:
I live alone, I'm not married.

Lady Britt Dorset:
Are you queer or divorced?

Lady Britt Dorset:
What I need is an attentive lover, very rich who adores me, who will not be cross if I'm a little unfaithful sometimes.

Lady Britt Dorset:
Here's a present for you, I bought it for Nick but he doesn't deserve it.

Mr. Graham:
I want you, my lord, to grow a moustache.

Lord Nicholas "Nick" Dorset:
That's a joke in extremely bad taste.

Lord Nicholas "Nick" Dorset:
I don't know why I can't use my own tailor in London.

Mr. Graham:
One can't be too careful.

Lord Nicholas "Nick" Dorset:
You can't possibly understand what an ordeal it is to wear clothes made by a stranger.

Lord Nicholas "Nick" Dorset:
[to Britt] You sometimes reveal a revoltingly servile streak. Very vulgar. Something to do with being a foreigner, I suppose.

Lady Britt Dorset:
[to Nick] You are a divine bastard.