Someday You'll Find Her, Charlie Brown

Linus van Pelt:
[after Linus rings the doorbell, the first girl does not turn out to be pretty] Yes?

[Linus stammers, Charlie Brown signals to him she is not the one]

Linus van Pelt:
My friend out there has fallen madly in love with you.

Loretta:
[smiles] Ooh!

Linus van Pelt:
And he would like to meet you.

Loretta:
Yes!

[Charlie Brown goes nervous]

Linus van Pelt:
My friend says he saw you at last week's game - a honey shot.

Loretta:
Well! Where is this lothario?

Linus van Pelt:
Is this the girl, Charlie Brown?

Charlie Brown:
[shouts] NO!

[Loretta goes sad and Charlie Brown sighs in relief]

Teenager:
[to Linus after opening the door, in a hoarse voice] Yes?

Linus van Pelt:
[amazed at how stunning she looks] He's right! You ARE beautiful!

Teenager:
So I'm beautiful. What do you want?

Linus van Pelt:
I have this friend who's madly in love you. He saw you at the football game.

Teenager:
[smiles] You have? Where is he?

[She sees Charlie Brown, who signals to Linus indicating she is not the one]

Teenager:
[angry at this] That kid choking out there?

Linus van Pelt:
Yes, he saw you at the game and fell madly in love with you.

Teenager:
That little kid - I'm not interested in little kids!

Linus van Pelt:
You were at the football game, weren't you?

Charlie Brown:
[Reading from a book] Tis better to have loved and lost then never to have loved at all. [Turns the pages, reads again] Does the imagination dwell the most upon a woman won, or a woman lost? [Closes the book] I can't stand it.

Charlie Brown:
Two seconds is all you need to fall in love.

Linus van Pelt:
[Rolling his eyes] Especially when it happens every week.