The Blair Witch Project: A Hardcore Parody

Nikki:
Are you wet, Brit?

Britney:
Yes, of course. Are you wet?

Nikki:
I'm always wet.

Brandy:
Baby, is this sh*t even real or is this your way of getting me to f*** you on camera?

Britney:
Hey, I'm Britney and this is my house. And I have my friends here and were shooting a documentary about the Blair Witch this weekend.

Britney:
The legend of the Blair Witch has long been a part of history in this region for over 2 centuries. The legend has grown throughout the years. The story began sometime in the late 1600's when a group of young citizens of the township of Blair accused Ellie Kenward of luring them into her home to draw blood from them.

Daisy:
Mmm, was she hot?

Britney:
Cut the sh*t, Daisy. I'm doing the intro slate.

Britney:
[crying] I want to apologize to everybody's families. I was so naive. This is all my fault because it was my project that I insisted on doing. And whatever happens to everybody tonight, this'll be all my fault. Because this was my project. It was my documentary. I love you, Mom. And Dad.

Nikki:
[showing her breasts] They're small, but they're perky.

Britney:
I said there's probably somebody out there f***ing with us. It's probably some f***ing a**hole. We're fine.