The Quickie

Oleg:
You know, I've never f***ed a cockroach killer before.

Lisa:
Nice. I've never f***ed a Russian.

Anna:
You look wonderful!

Michael:
Anna I love you, but you're such a liar.

Oleg:
You like the house, don't you?

Anna:
I hate this house. I hate it. I hate everything it stands for. And I will never live in this house, and neither will Alex.

Alex:
Aw, come on!

Anna:
We are leaving tomorrow.

Oleg:
[slams his hand on the table] Now you listen to me. I bought this f***ing house for you. If you ever want to see another penny from me, then you're going to f***ing live here and we are gonna be a f***ing family, and that's an order.

Anna:
[after Oleg leaves the room] Over my dead body.

Deema:
Hey, don't play with guns. It's not a toy.

Alex:
F*** you!

Oleg:
I wanna play a game with you.

Call Girl:
Okay, what kind of game? I don't do kinky.

Oleg:
This isn't at all kinky. You just have to watch. It's called Russian Roulette. [pulls out a handgun] Relax. You want more money?

Call Girl:
Yeah.

Oleg:
[throws more money on the bed] Okay?

Call Girl:
Yeah.

Oleg:
Here's the game: You have to bet that money I gave you on whether I live, [puts one bullet in the gun, spins the cylinder, and closes the cylinder] or I die.

Call Girl:
What do you mean?

Oleg:
I mean, you have to bet when I pull this trigger, [points gun at his head] I'm going to live or I'm going to die.

Call Girl:
I can't do that. I - I don't think I like this game.

Oleg:
It's very Russian. Come on, place your bet. What's it going to be?

Call Girl:
[puts all her money on the bed] Four-thousand says you die, you crazy f***!

Oleg:
[pulls the trigger, but no shot was made] Sorry, [takes money away from her] this just wasn't your lucky night.

Call Girl:
You cheap a**hole. You knew!

Oleg:
[after she leaves the bed room] No, I didn't know.

Call Girl:
Can we try again? I thought maybe you'd like to play that game again. I didn't get a fair chance.

Oleg:
Take the money and get lost.

Call Girl:
Thanks.

Lisa:
You know, I can't start spraying until someone cleans this mess up.

Deema:
Nobody here can do it.

Lisa:
What about you?

Deema:
I don't do dishes.

Lisa:
[smiling] Oh, we have a little bit of a problem then.

Oleg:
You need money, huh?

Lisa:
Yeah, most people do. Do you?

Oleg:
No, I'm more of the philanthropic type.

James:
I got a call from Moscow, there's a problem.

Oleg:
Relax, there's always problems in Moscow.

Oleg:
[to Alex] You wanna play with guns? Then you must be ready to kill. You understand? Kill. And if you are wrong, f*** it, it's still the right thing to do.

Oleg:
Listen, how would you like to make another four-hundred?

Lisa:
For what, cleaning up the rest of your house?

Oleg:
No, a quickie.

Lisa:
Oh, I don't think you're up for that!

Oleg:
You're right, but I'm willing to try.

Lisa:
I think you're gonna have alot more luck with those girlies at the pool.

Lisa:
I should go.

Oleg:
No, stay.

Lisa:
Why?

Oleg:
I told you I'm lonely, I need somebody. I'll pay you.

Lisa:
[pauses] How much?

Oleg:
How much do you want?

Lisa:
Alot. And I'm not gonna f*** you.

Oleg:
It's a deal. [pause] I like being with you.