John Candy:
Eugene Levy? I don't know anybody named Eugene Levy.

Leslie Nielsen:
Eugene Levy? No!

Anne Murray:
I don't know Eugene Levy at all.

Dave Thomas:
If Candy says he doesn't know him, that's good enough for me. I don't know him either. Sorry, pal.

Leslie Nielsen:
I called him and told HIM not to leave? I'll tell you something. If I had ever called him for any reason, I'd be calling him to tell him TO LEAVE! And that's the truth of it so you know I'm not lying.

Eugene Levy:
What can I say? Leslie Nielsen is LYING!

Leslie Nielsen:
I did not call Eugene Levy, whoever he may be.

Eugene Levy:
He did.

Leslie Nielsen:
I didn't.

Eugene Levy:
He did.

Leslie Nielsen:
I didn't.

Eugene Levy:
DID!

Leslie Nielsen:
Didn't.

Eugene Levy:
DID!

Leslie Nielsen:
Didn't.

Eugene Levy:
DID!

Leslie Nielsen:
Didn't.

Leslie Nielsen:
I never called him.

Eugene Levy:
Well, he's a big fat liar.

Eugene Levy:
I'm sorry, America.

Eugene Levy:
Hey, no hard feelings, eh?