Ernie:
Like my Daddy always said, "If you can't get out of it, get into it."

Logan:
I thought your daddy used to say, "If you can't fix it, fuck it."

Ernie:
He said that, too.

Bobby:
You're the only man I know who can screw up his own wet dream.

Bobby:
Which one do you want?

Ernie:
The mean one.

Bobby:
You're a sick man.

Ernie:
You bet!