George Carlin:
The longer you listen to this abortion debate, the more you hear the phrase "sanctity of life," "sanctity of life." You believe in it? Personally, I think it's a bunch of shit. I mean, life is sacred? Who said so? God? Hey, if you read history, you realize that God is one of the leading causes of death.

George Carlin:
If everything that ever lived is dead, and everything that's alive is gonna die, where does the sacred part come in?

George Carlin:
How come when it's with us, it's an 'abortion', and when it's with chickens it's an 'omelet'?

George Carlin:
People say life begins at conception, I say life began about a billion years ago and it's a continuous process.

George Carlin:
Why is it that most of the people who are against abortion are people you wouldn't want to fuck in the first place?

George Carlin:
Fuck Mickey Mouse! Fuck him in the ass with a big rubber dick! And then break it off and beat him with it!