Gleaming the Cube 
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Tina Trac: How did you get to be so cynical?
Brian Kelly: Practice.
Brian Kelly: I guess we all do unexpected things sometimes, don't we?
Brian Kelly: Can I ask you something personal?
Tina Trac: Sure...
Brian Kelly: Where's the bathroom?
Brian Kelly: I don't know what's worse: getting blown up in nuclear war or having a 7-11 on every corner.
Bobby Nguyen: Don't give me a jerk-off handjob!
Brian Kelly: Do you know what a farm vet does? He helps cows get well so they can live long enough to be turned into Quarter Pounders. It's ridiculous!
Brian Kelly: If my dog had a face like yours I'd shave his ass and tell him to walk backwards.