Dustin:
Bow wow, you keep barkin' at me and your gunna get a one way walk into the woods.

Matt:
Greetings from the interior.

Matt:
Greetings from the interior...

Eric:
Matt!

Sweet Lou:
I think I can taste that one...

Eric:
MATT!

Matt:
That wasn't me.

Bell Clerk:
Sorry, that was me. Whoo! Can I have my underwear back?

Dustin:
You know what, I remember Matt listening to your crap, and look where that got him. The guy is a complete stain.

Eric:
That's where Matt deceives you.

Dustin:
I don't think Matt deceives me.

Eric:
Because in actuallity he really know's which end is up.

Dustin:
I dropped something and I'm looking for it.

Dustin:
Didn't your mom ever tell you not to talk to strangers?

Dustin:
I guess she didn't say anything about puking on them.

Dustin:
So to recap, um, we smell like turds, we have no car, no Jimmy Wilson, and I'm broke. I guess you could call me stupid.

Matt:
Hey Stupid.

Dustin:
What?

Dustin:
Wake up, and smell the desperation.

Matt:
I'm in a dry spell.

Dustin:
To be in a dry spell you have had to be in a wet spell.

Matt:
I've had sex.

Dustin:
With a human being?

Matt:
Who's making up all these rules?

Sweet Lou:
Wham, bam, steal the van.

Sweet Lou:
Sweet Lou cleans no man's poop.

Dustin:
Okay, you know what? I just got peed on.

Matt:
You know what? I just got violated by a lizard, man!

Matt:
Actually, that felt pretty good.

Dustin:
Hold on, I'm gonna go get you another glass of bitch.

Eric:
Could you just tell Jimmy we dropped by?

Tour Manager:
You know... I could. But I just don't want to and, um, there doesn't seem to be much of a way around so maybe you can just go away. Go on.

Matt:
Chilli, chilli, chilli, chilli.