Hard Way

Nick Lang:
Hey, look at this. They got my billboard across the street.

John Moss:
Good, you'll be sleeping close to the one you love.

John Moss:
Not if you tied my toung to your tail-pipe and drove me eighty miles-an-hour naked across a field of broken glass. No. No.

John Moss:
Why don't you go tie your dick in a knot?

Nick Lang:
When are you going to get me something with a little relevance, a little social conscience, something that doesn't have a goddamn Roman numeral in the title? You ever hear of "Hamlet III," "Midsummer Night's IV"?

Angie:
They made "Henry V"! It won awards for that little Scottish guy!

Nick Lang:
Oh man, this is too real.

Pooley:
Jesus, Moss, what are you gonna tell the captain? "I'm sorry about the forty-five people I killed, I was horny?"

John Moss:
No one since my divorce even stuck around for a second date. They say they don't like me being a cop, or I don't know, maybe its something about my personality-

John Moss:
HEY, UP YOURS, A**HOLE! What do you think?

John Moss:
Now what you boys want to do is you want to graduate from high school, get decent jobs. Take a shot at white-collar crime, that's where the real money is!

Captain Brix:
You got two ways to deal with this: you got the easy way, you got...

John Moss:
The hard way.

Captain Brix:
Right. John, do us all a favor and make the right choice.

John Moss:
I always do.

John Moss:
I gave the little maggot a chance! I got to the bathroom and back. He doesn't belong here, he belongs in Never-Never Land, with his personal trainer, and his assistants, and his maid, and his God-knows-who-all, the guy who wipes his ass after he pinches off his daily loaf, OK?

John Moss:
C'mon where are you staying? the Plaza... the Regiun... c'mon where?

Nick Lang:
I'm staying with you.

John Moss:
Maybe when my a**hole learns to chew gum.

John Moss:
Look, dickwad. I don't give a rat's ass about where you come from. All I care about is where you're going.

John Moss:
Listen, you little cockroach! I got yanked off a case so you can get wanked off being a cop groupie and now what? You wanna live in my house? I got a job to do and I'm gonna do it and I don't have time for anybody in my house, in my car, or in my life who isn't a: a cop or b: The Party Crasher. You got it?

Nick Lang:
So that's what this is all about, isn't it? You're still after this guy.

Nick Lang:
Oh, don't you take that tone with me!

Captain Brix:
Shut up, Moss, we're trying to read the end credits.