Bones:
Actually, I wish you WERE my "first" sergeant, but I already had a couple before you.

Bones:
Can I call you 'General Sweetpants'?

Bones:
Where did the sun go?

Jack:
There is no sun anymore. We died, and this is hell.

Bones:
Oh, ok. Thanks for clearing that up.

Sgt. Ladd:
Drop down and give me twenty!

Bones:
Here. Take the whole wallet.

Bones:
Thank you, sir. But I could not have done it without the help and inspiration of my brother, the poolman.

Sgt. Stern:
Dad, why can't I go to ballet class? Teacher said I'm a natural.

Jack:
Oh no... that's not good. That's noooot good. Uh-oh... he's coming over...

Bones:
I don't know. How does it feel to be a dick, dick?

Bones:
Is it hot in Chad?

Bones:
Hey this reminds me of camp... John Jacob Jingle Himenschmidt

Bones:
Your sucking too much sand in the air filter! I'M ORDERING YOU!

Jack:
Your ordering me?

Bones:
I'm first class...

Bones:
now I'm ordering you!

Jack:
The only reason your first class is cause your brother is a poolman! (Truck makes a poping noise and

Jack:
It's the ocean! it's the ocean!

Bones:
Wow Jack... LOOK AT THAT ASS! Wooo! Maybe you should stay naked!

Bones:
I've seen lots of camel toes before, but never on a camel!

Sgt. Ladd:
See here, it's foolproof, even for you.