In the Army Now 
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Bones: Actually, I wish you WERE my "first" sergeant, but I already had a couple before you.
Bones: Can I call you 'General Sweetpants'?
Bones: Where did the sun go?
Jack: There is no sun anymore. We died, and this is hell.
Bones: Oh, ok. Thanks for clearing that up.
Sgt. Ladd: Drop down and give me twenty!
Bones: Here. Take the whole wallet.
Bones: Thank you, sir. But I could not have done it without the help and inspiration of my brother, the poolman.
Sgt. Stern: Dad, why can't I go to ballet class? Teacher said I'm a natural.
Jack: Oh no... that's not good. That's noooot good. Uh-oh... he's coming over...
Bones: I don't know. How does it feel to be a dick, dick?
Bones: Is it hot in Chad?
Bones: Hey this reminds me of camp... John Jacob Jingle Himenschmidt
Bones: Your sucking too much sand in the air filter! I'M ORDERING YOU!
Jack: Your ordering me?
Bones: I'm first class...
Bones: now I'm ordering you!
Jack: The only reason your first class is cause your brother is a poolman! (Truck makes a poping noise and
Jack: It's the ocean! it's the ocean!
Bones: Wow Jack... LOOK AT THAT ASS! Wooo! Maybe you should stay naked!
Bones: I've seen lots of camel toes before, but never on a camel!
Sgt. Ladd: See here, it's foolproof, even for you.