Vic:
I know the man. Actually we're distantly related. My... um... my mothers sister - she married his old man in Cheltenham. That makes me his half-cousin, twice removed... or... close enough.

Vic:
That's me.

Vic:
Hello.

Vic:
Is he big?

Vic:
That's okay - he'll like me. Lots of people like me. Well not straight away but give it a couple o' minutes and...

Vic:
Yogi. Er...

Vic:
Olliandum.

Vic:
Whoosh. Whoosh Olliandum.

Vic:
He'll find out sooner or later about his mother. Only I did promise I'd tell him personally - you know what mothers... are... like. How's your mother? She well? I hope so.

Screaming Lord Byron:
I've got a teensy weensy little headache, and I wonder if you might switch that thing OFF... until I finish passing out, thank you.

Vic:
Mr Screaming. Er... good evening. I'm from the Melody Faces - no - one of the music magazines. I was with a music magazine now I'm with a more high profile kind of... aw I've really hurt me head.