Linguini Incident 
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Lucy: You know perfectly well, new sex is like crack.
Vivian: She can read my tits!
Lucy: We should go to the park this weekend and watch all the children shooting squirrels with their BB guns.
Vivian: True. We don't appreciate nature, enough.
Vivian: The simple plan is, no one in this room is going to have sex with anyone else in this room. We'll be platonic... like our parents.
Vivian: You need to get laid.
Lucy: YOU need to get laid!
Vivian: I don't need to get laid. I stored it up before me and Hector broke up.
Lucy: Stored up? What are you, a chipmunk?
Monte: That's Lucy the Ethereal.
Monte: Monte... the Emasculated.
Vivian: You don't just make out with someone in a meat locker who you're indifferent to.
Monte: AGGH! God, you're alive! I thought that rabbit was eating your head.