Spider:
I forgot my rubber.

Spider's Whore:
Did you remember to bring your dick?

Dave:
Just get one thing straight, Wimp. We may be stuck with you, but that doesn't mean you're going to ruin our trip just because you're a little brat kid! We're going to be as crude as we want, as filthy as we want, and as gross as we want! You understand that, Wimp?

Wendell:
My name's Wendell, and why should today be any different?

Dave:
Wimp, I'm not like ordinary guys. I've got more than hormones, or something. You know, like a male nymphomaniac?

Wendell:
I feel sorry for you, Dave.

Dave:
Then loan me a few bucks, so I can go to another whorehouse!

Dave:
You know what that Tuck-and-Roll guy's doing right now? He's stuffing my seats with horseshit!

Marine:
Hey! The MP's will have us out of here. And when they do, you're dead.

Spider:
Says who, dick-breath?