Rome:
Harry's okay.

John:
Harry talks.

Rome:
Not anymore.

Sunny:
Like my new coat? Don't I look like a flapper?

Sam:
Hi, it's Sam. Leave me a message... or else.

TJ:
Let me ask you somethin'. If you're a priest, how come you get to have a girlfriend? What's up with that?

Jeremiah:
I'm Episcopal . . .

Jeremiah:
...not Catholic.

TJ:
It's not a pickup! It's an El Camino!

Jeremiah:
Last night I almost beat a total stranger to death, and I have no idea why. I'm supposed to be ordained a priest in less than a month. My brother hates me, my girlfriend won't marry me because she knows that I am a total fraud, and the only way that I can fix it all is to rip off these guys that I - I don't know, using money I don't have.

Tom:
You see, the great thing about God - unlike my ex-wife - you don't have to be perfect for him to accept you.

John:
What are you so happy about, TJ? Your girlfriend drop the charges?

John:
There's no smoking in my car!

Jeremiah:
My brother's alive?

Rome:
Temporarily.