Coach Reilly:
Why'd you turn against me, Gordon? For six years, I taughtcha how to skate, I taughtcha how to score, I taughtcha how to go for the "W". You could have been one of the greats! An' now look at yourself. You're not even a has-been. You're a never-was.

Jesse:
Yo dude! You obviously in the wrong hood. This is my dominion, and it's a drug free zone. You understand? Now I'm feelin' generous today. So I'm gonna let you get your sorry vanilla booty out of here before we be usin' your eyeballs as hockey pucks!

Goldberg:
Be careful man, it almost hit me that time!

Charlie Conway:
Goldberg, you're the goalie. It's supposed to hit you.

Goldberg:
Does that sound stupid to anyone else?

Gordon Bombay:
I hate kids. They're barely human.

Frank Huddy:
I don't mind losing, I would just like to lose fair.

Gordon Bombay:
Losing fair is still losing, Frank!

Gordon Bombay:
You think losing is funny?

Les Averman:
Well not at first but once you get the hang of it.

Goldberg:
My mother is not gonna approve of this, Coach! She wants me to live to be Bar Mitzvah'd!

Gordon Bombay:
This is your Bar Mitzvah, Goldberg. Today, you become a man.

Goldberg:
No. I think you've got the ceremonies mixed up this more like a CIRCUMCISION.

Frank Huddy:
Well, you really stooped low this time, Gordon.

Gordon Bombay:
I'm insulted by that, Frank, you have no idea how low I can stoop.

Gordon Bombay:
Now here's the long and the short of it: I hate hockey and I don't like kids.

Peter Mark:
What's this supposed to be, a pep talk?

Gordon Bombay:
I'm sure this will be a real bonding experience. One day, maybe one of you will write a book about it in jail.

Adam Banks:
Do me a favor. Kick some Hawk butt.

Gordon Bombay:
Did you really Quack at the Principal.

Gordon Bombay:
Are we Ducks or what?

Tammy Duncan:
Mom isn't going to like this!

Tommy Duncan:
So what! If you want me to figure skate then you gotta play hockey!

Tammy Duncan:
What do I know about hockey?

Tommy Duncan:
More than you think.