Our Lips Are Sealed

Well, look who grew up: Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen, once the sleepy-eyed preschoolers in the hit TV sitcom Full House, now wake to find themselves ready for their first day of high school. But the day doesn't shape up as ultra-fantastically as in their dreams. A series of bizarre circumstances (involving some supercharged catsup and a criminal with a "really gross zit") force them into a life-threatening situation in which only the FBI Witness Protection Program can help. It turns out that Mary-Kate and Ashley are their own worst enemies; the girls continually blow their cover until finally they're booted down under to the warm and sparkling recreation mecca of Sydney, Australia. Here the challenge to keep a secret takes second fiddle to the bigger challenges of fitting in with the popular group, learning Aussie lingo, and (apparently) changing into a new set of adorable clothes and accessories in almost every scene. Fans from 6 to 13 years old will probably enjoy the daffy antics of the Olsens, their adventures with cute boyfriends, and their ability to thwart the goofy bad guys. Plus, their acting ability--although crippled by yet another bubblehead script--continues to improve. To the parental crowd, the film plays somewhat like a New Age beach-blanket movie with plenty of surfer parties, flower-power fun, overblown story points, mild potty humor, and lots of belly buttons (LOTS of belly buttons). The movie also has some inexplicable references (to such grown-up phenomena as The Blair Witch Project and The Sopranos) that are bound to go way over the target audience's heads. Yet it's 90 minutes of absolutely clean fun that fans will eat up. --Liane Thomas