Stars: Stephen Dorff, Armin Mueller-Stahl, Morgan Freeman, Nomadlozi Kubheka, Agatha Hurle
Rating: PG-13 (Parental Guidance Suggested)
Runtime: 127 minutes
One of the big hits of the later '80s, Saint Seiya (1986) set the look and tone for Ronin Warriors, and will appeal to the same audience. After years of training in Greece, Seiya returns to Japan as a "saint" in bronze armor, one of the cadre of young warriors sworn to defend the goddess Athena in her current incarnation. The first episodes set up the characters, each of whom is linked to a constellation (Pegasus in Seiya's case). Seiya is forced to compete in the "Galactic Wars," a surprisingly violent round-robin battle for the legendary golden armor. It quickly becomes clear that the real heroes have higher motivations than personal glory: Seiya wants to find his long-lost sister; his friend and rival Shiryu fights for his mother's memory. A standard assortment of adoring girlfriends and feisty orphans complete the cast. (Rated 15 and older: considerable violence, profanity) --Charles Solomon
You know, my donkey, Beethoven, once told me a remedy of curing sadness in little boys. Would you like to try it?
Okay, stand up, on this brick wall, stand on one leg, good, now close your eyes, say three times "abosloodle".
Absoloodle, absoloodle, absoloodle.
No? I guess it proves one thing then.
Never take advice from a donkey.