Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
Now, are you sure you want to have a fight? Because I'm only gonna use my thumb.

Bully in Bar:
Thumb?

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
My right thumb. Left one's too powerful for you.

Donna Caldwell:
Say something.

Jay Austin:
What?

Donna Caldwell:
That's a start.

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
You're not going out dressed like that, are you?

Donna Caldwell:
Like what?

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
Well, you can see right through that dress. You might just as well go out without one.

Donna Caldwell:
There's a thought.

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
Ah, shit on a stick.

Sgt. Major Ross Maclure:
I've known buildings that were easier to talk to than you.

Sgt. Major Ross Maclure:
You open your mouth one more time, and I'll shove your head so far up your ass, you'll be talking out of your armpit.

Lt. Col. Alan Caldwell:
We used to joke that being in the army was not a matter of life and death. It's more important than that.