Ned:
I still say it's PMS

Frieda:
What does the name 'Aglet' mean anyway?

Braydon:
Well a long time ago 'Aglet' meant 'He who puts those tiny little plastic things on shoelaces' you see a long time a go a mans' name was his profession.

Frieda:
Oh so a man named Fred Carpenter would build houses and John Baker would make bread

Braydon:
Exactly

Ned:
So what did John Hancock do?

Gay bodybuilder:
Well, hello there I've always wanted my own personal trainer

Father Luke Brophy:
Excuse me I'm looking for a man...

Gay bodybuilder:
Get your own this one's already taken

Gene Okerlund:
Steroids aren't used in wrestling anymore are they Jesse?

Jesse Ventura:
...Or any less

Jebedaiah Mayii:
I said they were good kids at this point they hadn't taken acting lessons

Braydon:
What's going on, father? I just had to tie my wife down to the bed. I've never done anything like that before, well except for that one time when the kids were at camp.

Nancy:
Excuse me, doctor?

TV Doctor:
Oh I'm not a doctor but I do play one on TV that's why I recommend...

Nancy:
You may think you've won, Brophy, but I know another way to reach all those people!

Father Luke Brophy:
Satan wait! Where do you think you're going?

Nancy:
I'm going to Disneyland!

Nancy:
SILENCE! One more word out of you little sacks of shit, and there'll be no more T.V for you tonight!

Father Jebedaiah Mayii:
Luke, remember, when you fall on your face you're still moving forward.

Nancy:
Don't take a look at this picture of your mother in bed with Manuel Noriega!

Father Luke Brophy:
She has an unGodly voice, maniacal facial expressions...

Father Jebedaiah Mayii:
That doesn't prove a thing, she could be related to Joe Cocker.

Father Luke Brophy:
No.

Father Jebedaiah Mayii:
Could it be she had PMS?