Ebby Calvin LaLoosh:
How come you don't like me?

Crash Davis:
Because you don't respect yourself, which is your problem. But you don't respect the game, and that's my problem. You got a gift.

Ebby Calvin LaLoosh:
I got a what?

Crash Davis:
You got a gift. When you were a baby, the Gods reached down and turned your right arm into a thunderbolt. You got a Hall-of-Fame arm, but you're pissing it away.

Ebby Calvin LaLoosh:
I ain't pissing nothing away. I got a Porsche already; a 911 with a quadrophonic Blaupunkt.

Crash Davis:
Christ, you don't need a quadrophonic Blaupunkt! What you need is a curveball! In the show, everyone can hit heat.

Ebby Calvin LaLoosh:
Well, how would you know? YOU been in the majors?

Crash Davis:
Yeah, I've been in the majors.