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"I guess of all my uncles, I liked Uncle cave Man the best. We called him Uncle cave Man because he lived in a cave and because sometimes he'd eat one of us. Later on we found out he was a bear." »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
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"In this age when there can be no losers in peace and no victors in war, we must recognize the obligation to match national strength with national restraint." »Lyndon B. Johnson
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"A national debt, if it is not excessive, will be to us a national blessing." »Alexander Hamilton
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"Stan Well you can take the girl outta the trailer park but you can't take the trailer park outta the girl." »Swordfish
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"All I need to make a comedy is a park, a policeman and a pretty girl." »Charlie Chaplin
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"She had fortunately always her appetite for news. The pure flame of the disinterested burned in her cave of treasures as a lamp in a Byzantine vault." »Henry James, "The Ambassadors", Book Ninth, Chapter 2
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"I used to work in a fire hydrant factory. You couldn't park anywhere near the place." »Steven Wright
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"If there's ever an amusement park called Bag World, I bet it would really start to annoy you after a while how they really sort of stretch the definition of 'bag.'" »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
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"There's something intrinsically therapeutic about choosing to spend your time in a wide, open park- like setting that non-golfers can never truly understand." »Charles Rosin
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"I bet a fun thing would be to go way back in time to where there was going to be an eclipse and tell the cave men, 'If I have come to destroy you, may the sun be blotted out from the sky.' Just then the eclipse would start, and they'd probably try to kill you or something, but then you could explain about the rotation of the moon and all, and everyone would get a good laugh." »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
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"Life is nothing but the little time which spend in a park called the world after the time u cannot stay there." »SAYEED
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"Why is the place you drive on is a parkway, and the place you park on is the driveway?" »Charles Lauller
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"What is it about a beautiful sunny afternoon, with the birds singing and the wind rustling through the leaves, that makes you want to get drunk And after you're real drunk, maybe go down to the public park and stagger around and ask people for money, and then lie down and go to sleep." »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
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"The Paleolithic hunters who painted the unsurpassed animal murals on the ceiling of the cave at Altamira had only rudimentary tools. Art is older than production for use, and play older than work. Man was shaped less by what he had to do than by what he did in playful moments. It is the child in man that is the source of his uniqueness and creativeness, and the playground is the optimal milieu for the unfolding of his capacities." »Eric Hoffer
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"From a psychological point of view, when people go under pressure in life, be it economically or otherwise, they seek support from the people closest to them, usually religious or ethnic groups. They also start blaming other groups who have more control over the national resources. If the gap of power is wide, this will eventually create deep divisions in the nation. The divisions can take on new forms of conflict such as class warfare, ethnic, religious, political unrest and sometime civil war. The only effective protection against national divisions is an open socioeconomic system with a large and growing middle class" »Med Jones
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"History is a living horse laughing at a wooden horse. History is a wind blowing where it listeth. History is no sure thing to bet on. History is a box of tricks with a lost key. History is a labyrinth of doors with sliding panels, a book of ciphers with the code in a cave of the Saragossa sea. History says, if it pleases, Excuse me, I beg your pardon, it will never happen again if I can help it." »Carl Sandburg
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"Our national flower is the concrete cloverleaf." »Lewis Mumford
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"The national Rifle Association are the gun nuts of the world." »Cecil Andrus
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"Blessed are the young, for they will inherit the national debt." »Herbert Clark Hoover
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"Well, it looks like the all-star balloting is about over, especially in the national and American Leagues." »Jerry Coleman
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"The national task that had been incumbent upon me for 18 years is hereby confirmed." »Charles De Gaulle
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"It is dangerous for a national candidate to say things that people might remember." »Eugene McCarthy
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"Sex is the tabasco sauce which an adolescent national palate sprinkles on every course in the menu." »Mary Day Winn
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"When your are playing for the national championship, it's not a matter of life or death. It's more important than that." »Duffy Daugherty
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"No national political party is going to nominate another right-wing candidate for a long time." »Arthur Schlesinger, Jr., Playboy Interview - May 1966
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"American leaders created a system that allowed a free distribution of wealth and power. People leave their economic class and become richer regardless of their ethnic or national background. Therefore, despite having more diverse people in our society than any other nation, we have more stable national politics. If our elites try to limit the openness of the socioeconomic system, the system will be corrected in any number of forms including civic unrest. When Bush's administration invaded Iraq and bailed out Wall Street, the people brought in Obama. When Obama bailed out Wall Street again and considered raising the tax on the people, the system brought the Tea Party into power and the ruling party lost control of the Congress. People expressed their anger via peaceful elections." »Med Jones
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"You will be pleased to know I stand obediently for the national anthem, though of course I would defend your right to remain seated should you so decide." »Ira Glasser
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"My fellow Americans, our long national nightmare is over. (On succeeding Richard M Nixon as president)" »Gerald R. Ford
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"national Health Insurance:
The compassion of the IRS
The efficiency of the Postal Service
All at Pentagon prices!!!!" »Seen on a bumper sticker
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"Instead of putting a quarter under a kid's pillow, how about a pinecone That way, he learns that 'wishing' isn't going to save our national forests." »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
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| BTW, Why won't you become an editor? |
