| "I remember how the other kids used to say that old Mister Swenson was the meanest man in town. But I said I thought he was nice, that he just didn't know how to show it. The meanest man in town, I said, was the mean old guy who lived in the big white house. 'THAT'S MISTER SWENSON,' they said. Oh, my mistake." »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts |
| "The Joker What kind of a world is this where a man dressed as a bat gets ALL MY PRESS This town needs an enema" »Batman |
| "A student is not a professional athlete. ... He is not a little politician or junior senator looking for angles ... an amateur promoter, a glad-hander, embryo Rotarian, caf-society leader, quiz kid or man about town. A student is a person who is learning to fulfill his powers and to find ways of using them in the service of mankind." »Harold Taylor |
| "Don't live in a town where there are no doctors." »Jewish Proverb |
| "The town where I grew up has a zip code of E-I-E-I-O." »Martin Mull |
| "Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip." »Will Rogers |
| "I wish a robot would get elected President. That way, when he came to town, we could all take a shot at him and not feel too bad." »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts |
| "So live that you wouldn't be ashamed to sell the family parrot to the town gossip." »Will Rogers |
| "To say the least, a town life makes one more tolerant and liberal in one's judgement of others." »Henry Wadsworth Longfellow |
| "I would not vote for the mayor. It's not just because he didn't invite me to dinner, but because on my way into town from the airport there were such enormous potholes." »Fidel Castro |
| "I just don't think it's good for us to be run out of town. (Refusing to cancel Secretary of State visit to Moscow)" »Ronald Reagan |
| "An association of men who will not quarrel with one another is a thing which has never yet existed, from the greatest confederacy of nations down to a town meeting or a vestry." »Thomas Jefferson |
| "Nothing ever gets settled in this town. ... a seething debating society in which the debate never stops, in which people never give up, including me. And so that's the atmosphere in which you administer." »George Pratt Shultz |
| "We used to laugh at Grandpa when he'd head off to go fishing. But we wouldn't be laughing that evening, when he'd come back with some whore he picked up in town." »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts |
| "I just owe almost everything to my father and it's passionately interesting for me that the things that I learned in a small town, in a very modest home, are just the things that I believe have won the election." »Margaret Hilda Thatcher |
| "Trent You know I used to wait two days to call anybody, but now it's like everyone in town waits two days. So I think three days is kind of money. What do you think" »Swingers |
| "One person can have a profound effect on another. And two people...well, two people can work miracles. They can change a whole town. They can change the world." »Andrew Schneider |
| "A small town is a place where there is no place to go where you shouldn't." »Burt Bacharach |
| "From this day forward, the millions of our schoolchildren will daily proclaim in every city and town, every village and rural schoolhouse, the dedication of our nation and our people to the Almighty. (On signing law for inclusion of the words 'under God' in the Pledge of Allegiance, 14 Jun 54)" »Dwight D Eisenhower |
| "One mind awake can awaken another, The second awake can awaken their next door brother. Three awake can awaken the town By turning the whole place upside down. Many awake can make such a fuss That they finally awaken the rest of us." »Helen Kromer |
| "Once you permit those who are convinced of their own superior rightness to censor and silence and suppress those who hold contrary opinions, just at that moment the citadel has been surrendered. For the American citadel is a man. Not man in general. Not man in the abstract. Not the majority of men. But man. That man. His worth. His uniqueness." »Archibald MacLeish |
| "Slater Behind every good man there is a woman, and that woman was Martha Washington man, and everyday George would come home, she would have a big fat bowl waiting for him, man when he come in the door, man she was a hip, hip, hip lady, man." »Dazed and Confused |
| "The man who gets the most satisfactory results is not always the man with the most brilliant single mind, but rather the man who can best coordinate the brains and talents of his associates." »Sir William Alton Jones |
| "It is not funny that anything else should fall down only that a man should fall down. Why do we laugh Because it is a gravely religious matter it is the Fall of Man. Only man can be absurd for only man can be dignified." »Gilbert Keith Chesterton |
| "Life's battles don't always go to the stronger or faster man. But sooner or later the man who wins, is the man who thinks he can." »Vince Lombardi |
| "Reading maketh a full man, conference a ready man, and writing an exact man." »Francis Bacon |
| "The man for whom law exists -- the man of forms, the Conservative, is a tame man." »Henry David Thoreau |
| "A man with a half volition goes backwards and forwards, and makes no way on the smoothest road a man with a whole volition advances on the roughest, and will reach his purpose, if there be even a little worthiness in it. The man without a purpose is like a ship without a rudder - a waif, a nothing, a no man. Have a purpose in life and having it, throw such strength of mind and muscle into your work as God has given you." »Thomas Carlyle |
| "The air is precious to the red man, for all things share the same breath-the beast, the tree, the man, they all share the same breath. The white man does not seem to notice the air he breathes. Like a man dying for many days, he is numb to the stench." »Chief Seattle |
| "The wise man can pick up a grain of sand and envision a whole universe. But the stupid man will just lie down on some seaweed and roll around until he's completely draped in it. Then he'll stand up and go, 'Hey, I'm Vine Man.'" »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts |
| New: We also know Zip Codes FYI! |
