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"Probably to a shark, about the funniest thing there is is a wounded seal, trying to swim to shore, because WHERE DOES HE THINK HE'S GOING" »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
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"It's better to be a pirate than to join the navy." »Steve Jobs
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"If you ever crawl inside an old hollow log and go to sleep, and while you're in there some guys come and seal up both ends and then put it on a truck and take it to another city, boy, I don't know what to tell you." »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
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"A language is a dialect with an army and a navy." »Max Weinreich
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"Have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. It’s better to be a pirate than to join the navy." »Steve Jobs
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"One of these days in your travels, a guy is going to come up to you and show you a nice brand-new deck of cards on which the seal is not yet broken, and this guy is going to offer to bet you that he can make the Jack of Spades jump out of the deck and squirt cider in your ear. But, son, do not bet this man, for as sure as you are standing there, you are going to end up with an earful of cider." »Damon Runyon
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"There is a homely old adage which runs Speak softly and carry a big stick you will go far. If the American nation will speak softly, and yet build and keep at a pitch of the highest training a thoroughly efficient navy, the Monroe Doctrine will go far." »Theodore Roosevelt
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"There is a homely old adage which runs: "Speak softly and carry a big stick; you will go far." If the American nation will speak softly, and yet build and keep at a pitch of the highest training a thoroughly efficient navy, the Monroe Doctrine will go far." »Theodore Roosevelt, Speech in Chicago, 3 Apr. 1903
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