| "It's easy to halve the potato where there's love." »Irish Proverb |
| "The man who has nothing to boast of but his illustrious ancestry is like the potato - the best part under ground." »Thomas Overbury |
| "I think someone should have had the decency to tell me the luncheon was free. To make someone run out with potato salad in his hand, pretending that he's throwing up, is not what I call hospitality." »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts |
| "Worship the potato The idea seemed silly to me. But then I thought, what else is more deserving of worship It's simple, it comes from the earth, and it can kill you if you disobey it." »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts |
| "No mockery in the world ever sounds to me as hollow as that of being told to cultivate happiness Happiness is not a potato, to be planted in mould, and tilled with manure." »Charlotte Bronte |
| "If you're an archaeologist, I bet it's real embarrassing to put together a skull from a bunch of ancient bone fragments, but then it turns out it's not a skull but just an old dried-out potato." »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts |
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