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"A professional is someone who can do his best when he doesn't feel like it." »Alistair Cooke
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"The only reason for being a professional writer is that you can't help it." »Leo Rosten
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"I believe that professional wrestling is clean and everything else in the world is fixed." »Frank Deford
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"Engineering is the professional art of applying science to the optimum conversion of natural resources to the benefit of man." »Ralph J. Smith
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"If you had a school for professional fireworks people, I don't think you could cover fuses in just one class. It's just too rich a subject." »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
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"The United States has become a place where entertainers and professional athletes are mistaken for people of importance." »Robert A. Heinlein
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"Engineering is the professional and systematic application of science to the efficient utilization of natural resources to produce wealth." »T. J. Hoover
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"It takes a lot of balls to golf the way I do." »Unknown
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"Live.....Laugh.....golf" »Kathryn Schaefer Plaum
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"They say golf is not a contact sport. Not the way we play it." »Alice Cooper, BBC6 Radio, The Bruce Dickinson show
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"golf and sex are about the only things you can enjoy without being good at." »Jimmy Demaret
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"golf isn't a game, it's a choice that one makes with one's life." »Charles Rosin
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"The income tax has made liars out of more Americans than golf." »Will Rogers
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"golf is like a love affair if you don't take it seriously, it's no fun. If you do take it seriously, it breaks your heart." »Arnold Daly
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"I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles." »G.K. Chesterton
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"Foster golf club and cemetery - Only one stroke away from each other..." »David Helyar
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"The income tax has made more liars out of the American people than golf has." »Will Rogers
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"It took me seventeen years to get 3,000 hits in baseball. I did it in one afternoon on the golf course." »Hank Aaron
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"If you watch a game, it's fun. If you play at it, it's recreation. If you work at it, it's golf." »Bob Hope
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"Do you know what happens when you slice a golf ball in half Someone gets mad at you. I found this out the hard way." »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts
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"A golf course is the epitome of all that is transitory in the universe, a space not to dwell in, but to get over as quickly as possible." »Jean Giraudoux
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"golf is a game in which you claim the privileges of age, and retain the playthings of childhood." »Samuel Johnson
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"It is nothing new or original to say that golf is played one stroke at a time. But it took me many years to realize it." »Bobby Jones
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"It is impossible to imagine Goethe or Beethoven being good at billiards or golf." »H.L. Mencken
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"If I had my way, any man guilty of golf would be ineligible for any office of trust in the United States." »H. L. Mencken
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"I do not regret one professional enemy I have made. Any actor who doesn't dare to make an enemy should get out of the business." »Bette Davis
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"The word liberal distinguishes whatever nourishes the mind and spirit from the training which is merely practical or professional or from the trivialities which are no training at all." »Alan Simpson
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"America believes in education: the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week." »Evan Esar
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"America believes in education the average professor earns more money in a year than a professional athlete earns in a whole week." »Evan Esar
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"golf may be played on Sunday, not being a game within the view of the law, but being a form of moral effort." »Stephen Leacock
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