| "I wish I lived back in the Old west days, because I'd save up my money for about twenty years so I could buy a solid-gold pick. Then I'd go out west and start digging for gold. When someone came up and asked what I was doing, I'd say, 'Looking for gold, ya durn fool.' He'd say, 'Your pick is gold.' And I'd say, 'well, that was easy.' Good joke, huh" »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts |
| "I have become a queer mixture of the East and the west, out of place everywhere, at home nowhere." »Jawaharlal Nehru |
| "My boat goes west, your's east. Heaven's a wind for both journeys." »Chao Li-hua |
| "Illegal aliens have always been a problem in the United States. Ask any indian." »Robert Orben |
| "When asked by an anthropologist what the indians called America before the white man came, an indian said simply, Ours." »Father Andrew SDC |
| "N.B. This quote refers to the British disarmament of the indian Army. Gandhi never advocated the individual right to bear arms." »Mahatma Gandhi |
| "If you were a poor indian with no weapons, and a bunch of conquistadores came up to you and asked where the gold was, I don't think it would be a good idea to say, 'I swallowed it. So sue me.'" »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts |
| "The little dictator who went to Moscow in his green fatigues to receive a bear hug did not forsake the doctrine of Lenin when he returned to the west and appeared in a two-piece suit. (On Daniel Ortega Saavedra)" »Ronald Reagan |
| "I hear it said that west Berlin is militarily untenable-and so was Bastogne, and so, in fact, was Stalingrad. Any danger spot is tenable if men-brave men-will make it so." »John Fitzgerald Kennedy |
| "Winston Churchill was not entirely British. His mother was American, making Sir Winston part Iroquois indian." »Rachel Blanchard |
| "An indian tribe is sovereign to the extent that the U.S. permits it to be sovereign." »Russell Smith |
| "I believe much trouble and blood would be saved if we opened our hearts more. I will tell you in my way how the indian sees things. The white man has more words to tell you how they look to him, but it does not require many words to speak the truth." »Chief Joseph |
| "Hither the heroes and nymphs resort,To taste awhile the pleasures of a courtIn various talk th'instuctive hours they past,Who gave the ball, or paid the visit lastOne speaks the glory of the British Queen,And one describes a charming indian screenlA third interprets motions, looks and eyesAt every word a reputation dies." »Alexander Pope |
| "If I lived back in the Wild west days, instead of carrying a six-gun in my holster, I'd carry a soldering iron. That way, if some smart-aleck cowboy said something like, 'Hey look. He's carrying a soldering iron' and started laughing, and everybody else started laughing, I could just say, 'That's right, it's a soldering iron. The soldering iron of justice.' Then everybody would get real quiet and ashamed, because they made fun of the soldering iron of justice, and I could probably hit them up for a free drink." »Jack Handey Deep Thoughts |
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