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Sandy Carl I want you to kill all the gophers on the golf course Carl Spackler Correct me if I'm wrong Sandy, but if I kill all the golfers they'll lock me up and throw away the key. Sandy Not golfers, you great fool. Gophers. THE LITTLE BROWN, FURRY RODENTS. Carl Spackler We can do that. We don't even need a reason.
Judge Smails It's easy to grin When your ship comes in And you've got the stock market beat. But the man worthwhile, Is the man who can smile, When his shorts are too tight in the seat.
Spalding Smails This is good stuff. I got it from a Negro. You're probably high already and you don't even know it.
Danny Noonan I haven't even told my father I'm not gonna get that scholarship. I'm gonna end up working in a lumberyard the rest of my life. Ty Webb What's wrong with lumber I own two lumberyards. Danny Noonan I notice you don't spend too much time there. Ty Webb I'm not quite sure where they are.