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I think there’s this idea that high school bullying is like pushing someone into a locker and it wasn’t anything like that, i was kind of the ostracized one for whatever reason, there was just kind of this message always being spread along the group that I was unlovable, and I was unlikeable and I was ugly.
It never got to the point where I made any attempts or serious plans but I remember it was kind of this morbid obsession, when I was walking to school and I would see a car drive by me I would be like ‘Oh if I just go in front of that I can end this’, [or] I would see a knife in the kitchen and be like ‘If I just use this I could end it.’.
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