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Someday I want to be rich. Some people get so rich they lose all respect for humanity. That's how rich I want to be.
I gave my father $100 and said, 'Buy yourself something that will make your life easier.' So he went out and bought a present for my mother.
I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.
I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso.
Men who have a pierced ear are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewelry. Rita Rudner
My husband gave me a necklace. It's fake. I requested fake. Maybe I'm paranoid, but in this day and age, I don't want something around my neck that's worth more than my head.
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