John from Cincinnati

John Monad:
What do you want Butchie Yost?

[repeated line]

John Monad:
I don't know Butchie instead.

John Monad:
The end is near.

[first lines]

Cissy Yost:
Shaun! He's gone! My God! Kai, Shaunie's gone!

Mitch Yost:
[to Erlemeyer] I've been up in the air. I've seen my grandson come back from the dead.

Cissy Yost:
[to Tina, on the phone] to Say something, prick!

Tina Blake:
[on the phone] You mother f***er!

Cissy Yost:
[on the phone] What did you call me?

Bill Jacks:
[Bill is alone in his house] Shaun is gone and Zip is gone on my watch, do you understand? And that's the sum of it from here on in.

Cissy Yost:
[to Mitch] He was here last night in his bed and now he's gone.

Steady Freddie Lopez:
[Freddy throws down the Teddy Bear that Palaka gave him towards Barry's feet] For the boy. [pause] For the boy. That boy Shaun's gone.

Dwayne:
[to Jerri] Butchie's friend said "Shaun will soon be gone".

Jerri:
[to Meyer] Lay down, take a nap, and have a dream your supposed to f***ing leave!

Butchie Yost:
[to Cass] Your roommate grabbed my kid.

Cass:
Oh, my God.

Butchie Yost:
Now you're going to tell me what you know.

Bill Jacks:
[suddenly, one of Bill's other birds, after fifteen years, 'talks' to Bill. Bill is startled] Zip? Zip, is that you? Please forgive me. How could I have been so mistaken? Your wish is my command, your ladyship.

Dr. Michael Smith:
I've had terrible dreams, too.

Barry Cunningham:
No, not like this.

Vietnam Joe:
[referring to John] Tall drink of water with that poodle haircut.

Cass:
[to Butchie, referencing John] I think he is on some kind of automatic pilot.

Butchie Yost:
Every f***ing promise I ever made I broke.

Linc Stark:
Do what you gotta do. [Butchie punches Linc in the face]

Ramon Gaviota:
This is big. This is huge.

Barry Cunningham:
I think it very well could be.

Ramon Gaviota:
I want to cook something.

Sergeant Anderson:
Step off the street, please.

Bill Jacks:
Jesus Christ, Jesus Christ, Jesus Christ!

Mitch Yost:
Cissy, if you remember, I went up in the air.

Cissy Yost:
Why couldn't you have gone off a cliff?

Bill Jacks:
[to Freddy] You got my goddamn bird?

Butchie Yost:
John would hurt himself before he would hurt Shaunie.

Dwayne:
We know.

Cissy Yost:
Butchie, Shaun's gone.

Butchie Yost:
What?

Cissy Yost:
Now I want to know where your friend is who said he would be.

Barry Cunningham:
The same marvelous figures.

Bill Jacks:
Shaun is gone. Zip is gone. All on my watch.

Bill Jacks:
Stay, watch and feel! Stay, watch and feel! Lose 'em all one after the other.

Mitch Yost:
[to Erlemeyer] I think there might be extra terrestrials involved.

Erlemeyer:
Do I cross the line, Mitch, if I asked why you're down here?

Mitch Yost:
I lost my nerve.

Butchie Yost:
We're just talking about Shaunie. I want you to know he's gonna be alright.

Tina Blake:
How?

Linc Stark:
He needs to be looked for. It has to happen under the radar.

Tina Blake:
[to Butchie about Linc] He's helping find Shaun.

Mitch Yost:
What happened?

Cissy Yost:
What the f*** are you gonna do about it?

Mitch Yost:
Maybe I can help.

Barry Cunningham:
I dreamed about Butchie's son in the bar.

Dr. Michael Smith:
You dreamt he was in the bar?

Barry Cunningham:
Now he's gone.

[last lines]

Dwayne:
If you'll trust me with the key, I'll lock up.

Jerri:
The spare's under the planter out back.

[first lines]

Cass:
That's good.

Cissy Yost:
[Cissy is on the phone with Mitch] I hope you catch some real soul searchers!

Shaun Yost:
[to Cissy] You hurt my feelings, Gram. You did.

Linc Stark:
Stick around. Help me think.

Tina Blake:
Yeah, that's what I'm good at.

John Monad:
[John appears in the confines of Vietnam Joe's property] Don't be afraid, Joe. [Joe falls onto the ground, rises with a gun aimed at John]

Vietnam Joe:
That's a good way to get another near fatal injury there, frat boy.

John Monad:
[to Vietnam Joe] I got my eye on you.

John Monad:
[to Vietnam Joe] Zippy told Bill we'll be over.

Kai:
[to Cissy] Me and the Yosts. Information I don't give a f*** about.

Kai:
[to Cissy] Whoever you don't drive away, runs away on its own.

Bill Jacks:
[to John] Be aware that if you speak in that tone again I will break every bone in your body.

Dr. Michael Smith:
[to Butchie] There's lots of quick healers in this zip code.

Cissy Yost:
I want Tina to see Shaun.

Butchie Yost:
Which one of us was high last night, Ma?

Cissy Yost:
I was not f***ing high last night.

Tina Blake:
[to Linc] You f***ed me cross eyed. I never took a cock that big.

John Monad:
Shame on you, Billy. Wonderful.

Bill Jacks:
He's imitating my wife... who has passed!

Bill Jacks:
You see that guy there? Did he stab you? Yes or no?

John Monad:
[to Bill and Vietnam Joe] Better she tries to kill me and fails, than tries to kill herself.

Driver:
[to Tina] Hey, Tina. How's your ass? I got all your tapes. Came to most of them.

Bill Jacks:
[John, Bill and Joe are in Joe's van.] I would like to know our motive and our specific purpose. And I will not directly ask a moron?

John Monad:
[again, John simply repeats whatever Bill says] I would like to know our motive.

Bill Jacks:
Jesus Christ! Jesus Christ!

Bill Jacks:
[Bill is referencing John] He doesn't have a vocabulary. He's a human parrot!

John Monad:
I'm a human parrot.

Bill Jacks:
[to Vietnam Joe and John] My f***ing fibromyalgia is in upheaval!

Tina Blake:
I can't come back, Butchie.

Butchie Yost:
What? You got to suck some n*gger's prick?

John Monad:
Cissy Yoast...,

Cissy Yost:
What?

John Monad:
...are you sitting in your kitchen on Seventh Street thinking about blowing your head off with your gun you got back from Kai's trailer? Have you completely run out of whatever let you put up with your a**hole husband for thirty one years? Do you feel everything you ever touched in your entire life you turned to sh*t and mud? Are you ashamed Cissy that once when Mitch was on one of his bull-sh*t retreats and you were loaded on acid and Butchie was thirteen and he just won his first contest and you were so proud of him for not being Mitch and you went into his room and he was whippin his skippy, that you said let me show you how to do that? [makes jerking motion]

John Monad:
[to Cissy] Act now, Cissy. Baptize that f***ing pistol.

John Monad:
The word on the wall hears my father.

John Monad:
Mitch catches a good wave. Mitch wipes out. Mitch wipes out Cissy. Cissy shows Butchie how to do that. Cissy wipes Butchie out. Butchie hurts Barry's head. Mister Rollins comes in Barry's face. My Father runs the Mega-Millions.

John Monad:
[to Linc] Time to get back in the game, Linc Stark.

John Monad:
On the wall the line and circle are huge. On the wall, the man at the wall makes a man from the circle and line. You will not note my Father's word, but you will not forget what we did here.

Barry Cunningham:
[Barry is referring to the large crowd in attendance at the BBQ cookout] We should make these cookouts a fixture.

Bill Jacks:
[to John and Vietnam Joe] Judas Priest! The f***ing sun's gone down.

John Monad:
[to Bill and Vietnam Joe] My Father's birthday is the same as mine.

[last lines]

Vietnam Joe:
Well, this was time well spent.

Shaun Yost:
Are you staying in town?

Tina Blake:
I'm not sure.

Dr. Michael Smith:
You should have a cast on that?

Palaka:
Yeah, right. Talk of vanilla, hey Doc?

John Monad:
If my words are yours, can you hear my Father?

John Monad:
The zeros and ones make the word in Cass' camera.

Steady Freddy Lopez:
And you're even uglier than Abraham Lincoln.

Palaka:
Which happens he's got the same birthday as mine. February 12th, 1964.

Steady Freddy Lopez:
Yeah. 100 years after his murder.

Palaka:
Both of us.

John Monad:
I boned her and broke her jaw.

[first lines]

Mitch Yost:
[to Cissy] You know I want to tell you some things, if you want to listen.

Bill Jacks:
[to Zippy] Yes, I got along with the Hawaiian, Zippy. Twenty six years in law enforcement, I am able to coexist with sh*t heels.

Bill Jacks:
[to Zippy] I got my fish eye on you.

Vietnam Joe:
I put frat boy into my truck. He took my hand to his belly, and said I could help. And if I wasn't wasted, or it wasn't a joke, I did. He took my hand to his belly and he healed.

Shaun Yost:
Who was it outside of the house?

Cissy Yost:
You do not open the door for anybody.

Cissy Yost:
That porno slut is back!

Cissy Yost:
[to Mitch] No! You get out!

Linc Stark:
What's your name?

Tina Blake:
Tina Blake.

Linc Stark:
Really?

Tina Blake:
I'm supposed to believe you didn't know?

Linc Stark:
Honest to God. I'd never let myself watch porn otherwise I'd never do anything else. I feel like I'm meeting Babe Ruth.

Tina Blake:
Did he f*** a lot of people at once?

Linc Stark:
I'm Linc Stark.

Tina Blake:
I feel like I'm meeting Babe Ruth.

Butchie Yost:
[to Linc] I thought "Shaun" sounded like the waves when they were going back out.

Butchie Yost:
What do you want?

Tina Blake:
I want to see Shaun.

Butchie Yost:
Yeah, he's in all the papers, then you remembered you're his Mother.

Tina Blake:
[to Butchie] Yeah, and you're president of the I.B. morality brigade?

Butchie Yost:
Is Shaunie still in Lockdown?

Cissy Yost:
Who wants to know?

Butchie Yost:
She wants to meet her son.

Cissy Yost:
[furious] Her son?

Cissy Yost:
[Cissy is referring to the porn industry] It's the "business," now? Smiling at the camera while six guys come on your face?

Cissy Yost:
[to Butchie] As much acid as I took, I was never as stupid as you.

Cass:
[to John] I know that there's something going on, and I don't doubt that you're in the middle of it, John.

Butchie Yost:
[about Tina] You think she's gonna do something stupid.

Cissy Yost:
Cause everything up to now has been hot.

Steady Freddie Lopez:
Prepare for war my brother.

Linc Stark:
[to Tina] Ten people in a room, Butchie talks to nine of them. Who does he want to meet?

Tina Blake:
I don't know what I'm doing.

Butchie Yost:
Well, I never let that slow me up.

Butchie Yost:
[to Tina] Turn off the f***ing faucet, Tina. Give me a break.

Linc Stark:
And you come back to see how your boy grew up.

[last lines]

Linc Stark:
[to Tina] Keep me in the game.

Cissy Yost:
[to Shaun] You stay in the store. You keep the doors locked.

Mitch Yost:
I levitated.

Cissy Yost:
What?

Cissy Yost:
[to Mitch] Instead of floating I wish you could fly five hundred miles an hour into a f***ing brick wall.

Linc Stark:
I'll tell you something f***ed up.

Tina Blake:
It'll cost you an extra five hundred.

Linc Stark:
I'm having a little trouble breathing.

John Monad:
Work here, Cass.

Cass:
Here?

Cass:
I am no longer able to trade on my sex and I need to make some money.

John Monad:
You need your camera, Cass.

Cissy Yost:
[to John] John, John, don't do that.

Ernie, Bartender at the VFW:
[to Vietnam Joe] I can't serve you liquor at all. Not as long as you're holding that gun.

Vietnam Joe:
He knew I was behind with my boot off squeezing puss out of where the pongee stick went through my foot.

Ernie, Bartender at the VFW:
Who did?

Vietnam Joe:
This guy you put out there to make me think he was wounded so bad and pretend I brought him back.

Ernie, Bartender at the VFW:
I never repeated your story to anyone, Joe.

Linc Stark:
So did you get your end near the lady, my brother?

John Monad:
I got my end near the lady, my brother.

John Monad:
Meet the Jetsons!

[first lines]

Butchie Yost:
[to the truck driver] Hey, Moron! My toe! Ooh, yeah, you hard on!

Kai:
Is Shaun alright?

John Monad:
Shaun's alright.

Kai:
Where were you coming from off the water?

John Monad:
Cincinnati.

Shaun Yost:
[to John] I'll come back soon, John.

John Monad:
[to Linc] You're Linc Stark. You should get in the game.

Linc Stark:
Like Mitch Yost?

John Monad:
Mitch Yost should get back in the game

John Monad:
[to Linc] If my words are yours, can you hear my father?

John Monad:
Let's say I don't follow.

Linc Stark:
Let's say without Cass' camera, big and huge won't mean dick.

Linc Stark:
[to John] If you are the end, I am near you.

Linc Stark:
F*** *me*, John.

John Monad:
F*** *you*, Linc.

Linc Stark:
Does your Father have a Father, John?

John Monad:
My Father has a Father.

Linc Stark:
What's your Father's Father's name?

John Monad:
"Father".

Cissy Yost:
[to Mitch] Get back down here.

Linc Stark:
Do you have a Mother, John.

John Monad:
My Mother is my Father.

Butchie Yost:
Where the f*** did you go?

Shaun Yost:
[points to the sky] Cincinnati.

Butchie Yost:
Cincinnati's that way. The sky's up there.

Cissy Yost:
[to Butchie] Your f***ing Father's on the f***ing ceiling.

Butchie Yost:
Why don't we just pull you down, Dad?

Mitch Yost:
No.

Steady Freddie Lopez:
[to Palaka] Tell the queer I don't like the bears sitting together.

John Monad:
Linc is El Camino.

John Monad:
I don't know, Butchie, instead.

John Monad:
[to Mitch] Back in the game, Mitch Yost.

[last lines]

John Monad:
[final words of the show, as Kai is seen surfing] Mother of God, Cass-Kai.

[first lines]

John Monad:
The end is near.

Linc Stark:
Amen my brother. [Linc turns and sees a group of people walking] Those illegals act like it's just another day at the beach.

[Linc and John are watching Mitch surf]

Linc Stark:
You know Mitch Yost?

John Monad:
Mitch Yost should get back in the game.

Linc Stark:
Couple of fun ones, eh, Mitch?

John Monad:
You should get back in the game Mitch Yost.

Mitch Yost:
[to John] You should mind your own business. [to Linc] Go f*** yourself.

John Monad:
Some things I know and some things I don't know.

Vietnam Joe:
Tell me something you know.

John Monad:
The end is near.

Vietnam Joe:
Feel that way half the time myself.

John Monad:
Some things I know, and some things I don't.

Vietnam Joe:
I'll drop you off at Butchie's. He may know where Mitch is, get you your health insurance. Then I'm gonna roll a f***ing fattie!

[last lines]

John Monad:
I got my eye on you, Bill.

Mitch Yost:
[steps on a syringe in the sand] God damn it. A syringe. Maybe it's one of Butchiee's.

Linc Stark:
What's happened with Butchiee is one of the biggest mistakes of my life.

Mitch Yost:
Yeah, well, now he's proven to the world he can f*** up just fine without a sponsor.

Linc Stark:
[to Mitch] Trust the devil you know.

John Monad:
What do you want Butchie Yost?

Butchie Yost:
I want to see some dope come out of your pockets for my twenty three hundred.

Cissy Yost:
[Mitch has told Cissy that he believes he has a brain tumor as a result of his levitation] Why would you think you got brain cancer?

Mitch Yost:
I was hallucinating.

Cissy Yost:
You been getting high?

Mitch Yost:
No, it wasn't a hallucination. It's not like acid.

Bill Jacks:
Jesus, Mary and Joseph.

Shaun Yost:
He's alive.

John Monad:
I don't know Butchie instead.

Cissy Yost:
[to Security Guard, referring to Gary] This guy made a half ass pass at me.

Gary:
I am a diabetic! I did no such thing.

Bill Jacks:
[Bill and Shaun are riding together in Bill's truck. Bill is being passed on the road by drivers. To the first car that passes him] Up your ass! [to the second] Up your nose with a rubber hose. [to the third] F*** you! [Bill turns to Shaun] Excuse me, I lost my temper.

John Monad:
Room 24 shall give up its dead, and the dead shall be forgiven.

Butchie Yost:
[on the phone] I'm disappointed, Freddy. I'm out the twenty three hundred. I got the other guy.

Butchie Yost:
[to John] Into your pockets, brother. So we don't start not getting along.

Butchie Yost:
This f***ing Platinum card's got that rocket fuel. Broom-broom.

John Monad:
Broom!

Mitch Yost:
[to Cissy] In the lot, after I surfed, I was up in the air.

Shaun Yost:
I'm supposed to surf the Event Huntington.

Butchie Yost:
Your Grandfather sign off on that?

Shaun Yost:
Gran did.

Meyer Dickstein:
[to Ramon] This is Snuck Harbor's new owner, Ramon. Mr. Cunningham.

Barry Cunningham:
I'm a winner of the Mega Millions Lottery.

Ramon Gaviota:
Woah...

Shaun Yost:
Is Zippy dead?

Bill Jacks:
It's alright. This happens.

Bill Jacks:
[to Zippy] Well give the kid a kiss too, as long as you're being stupid.

Butchie Yost:
Now's your shot.

Mitch Yost:
Yeah, let me give you today's excuse for shooting up.

Butchie Yost:
I remember him. We were in the sixth grade together. It's Barry the Fairy.

Bill Jacks:
[as Barry attempts to kill himself] Hey! Barry, Barry, Barry! What's the matter with you?

Mitch Yost:
I just found out I'm pretty sick. Am I up in the air right now? It's the tumors big symptom.

Butchie Yost:
If that's a tumor, where do I sign up?

Mitch Yost:
What happened to Butchie is not happening to Shaun.

Cissy Yost:
Shaun doesn't have to be Butchie.

Mitch Yost:
You're still you, aren't you Cissy? You entered Shaun into the contest today.

Cissy Yost:
He entered. I signed the form as guardian.

Shaun Yost:
[after Cissy is arrested] Pigs got grandma.

Bill Jacks:
Haven't I told you not to use that word.

Meyer Dickstein:
Butchie Yost revolutionized surfing, Ramon.

Ramon Gaviota:
I think you're a little old for hero worship.

Meyer Dickstein:
[to Meyer and Ramon] Ladies.

Bill Jacks:
I got my eye on you.

John Monad:
I got my eye on you.

Bill Jacks:
No, I got my eye on you.

John Monad:
No, I got my eye on you.

Butchie Yost:
No, no, no. Wait, wait, wait. John! John! Somebody call an ambulance. Johnny Monad just put that waive in I.C.U.

Meyer Dickstein:
I know the WMD fiasco in Iraq is fresh in both our memories, Ramon.

Ramon Gaviota:
There were none.

Meyer Dickstein:
And I may be as wrong in my intelligence estimate as the CIA, but the man who just purchased this motel doesn't strike me as the most pleasant person.

John Monad:
Deal with the kid's in the works.

John Monad:
We are all frail vessels.

John Monad:
Butchie's mom hurt Barry's head.

John Monad:
Where Ramon is from, they would build Mitch a shrine.

John Monad:
One good blow job rocks the Jew lawyer's world.

John Monad:
Shaun will soon be gone.

Bill Jacks:
How can they be messing around when Cissy is in police custody?

Barry Cunningham:
Extraordinary! Even as I try to close the libros of this sordid edifice, write fini to the story of my deflowering at ten in Room twenty four.

Mitch Yost:
We oughta get wet.

[first lines]

Shaun Yost:
My dad's here.

Kai:
So is Sonny Mac. That's his ride next to your dad's.

Shaun Yost:
What the f*** do you know about Fiji twelve years ago?

Kai:
I know more than I let on.

John Monad:
We made a tape last night.

Cass:
We did? Why don't I remember?

John Monad:
Why don't I remember?

Cass:
Obviously, you do remember John. You just said so. What did we make the tape about? Are you saying me made a sex tape?

John Monad:
I am saying we made a sex tape.

John Monad:
[to Cass] I will be murdered twice. I will stare me down. Shaun will soon be gone.

John Monad:
[to Cass] We don't remember my Father's words.

John Monad:
[to Cass] You will find our tape in your room. I will see you at Barry's motel, Cass. Would you not remember my Father's words.

Cissy Yost:
[angered by Mitch's absence, she finds one of his books, then throws it out the door, screaming] Levitation for the Illuminated!

Linc Stark:
[Linc is referring to his old agency, and then to Shaun] Maybe they want me to sign him.

Tina Blake:
[To Linc] You win one free f***.

Linc Stark:
Thank you, very much.

Barry Cunningham:
[to Ramon] Thank goodness I'm not a felon.

Ramon Gaviota:
[to Barry] Do you have any medicine in your man purse?

Jerri:
[Jerry is bringing Linc and Tina their food] As a rule, we don't f***ing deliver.

Steady Freddie Lopez:
[to Palaka] Don't you know something bad is going to happen?

Shaun Yost:
[to Barry] It's okay. I'll be gone pretty soon.

Dwayne:
[to Cissy] Shaun will soon be gone.

Steady Freddie Lopez:
What do you want?

Bill Jacks:
I'm looking for Butchie, he owes me twenty bucks.

Bill Jacks:
[to Freddy] So I ask the questions here, and believe me, I care less than a f***!

Palaka:
And?

Dwayne:
And we're all a bit concerned about Butchie's son.

Bill Jacks:
[Bill is questioning Freddie in regards to himself and Palaka] Why should either of us pay attention to whatever you think?

Bill Jacks:
[Bill is angrily referring to John] Where the f*** did he come from?

Ramon Gaviota:
[softly] Cincinnati.

John Monad:
[to Butchie] We don't remember our father's words.

Butchie Yost:
Would you hurt Shaun? You'd never hurt Shaunie, would you John?

John Monad:
Hurting Shaun doesn't ring a bell.

Bill Jacks:
I got my eye on you.

Bill Jacks:
[Bill and John are alone in Butchie's Hotel room; Bill is referencing the message John left on Cass's computer] You're going to tell me exactly what that message means.

Bill Jacks:
[to John] Now, I don't want to get violent with you, but I told you no parrot talk.

John Monad:
[to Bill] There will be no more parrot talk.

John Monad:
[to Bill] I don't know Butchie, instead.

Bill Jacks:
[Bill leaves his interrogation of John] Forget about Cincinnati.

Bill Jacks:
Did you kill him?

Steady Freddie Lopez:
Nah.

Kai:
[Kai is drinking from a flask, referring to her years of commitment to the Yost family, especially Shaun] Fifteen years. Nice round number.

John Monad:
[to Cass] My father had more big and huge for me.

Cass:
[to John] Does your father mean well?

Butchie Yost:
[to Tina] Cissy wakes up pissed off.

Tina Blake:
I'm f***ing Linc.

Butchie Yost:
Why would you tell me that?

Butchie Yost:
[to Tina] You don't f*** Linc. Linc f***s you.

Bill Jacks:
[Bill is complaining about Freddie's car] It's like a goddamn matchbook car!

Bill Jacks:
[as he is attempting to exit Freddy's car] Jesus Christ Almighty!

John Monad:
[to Kai] Shaun will be gone. Butchie will need you on the water.

Butchie Yost:
Who am I, Doctor Phil?

[last lines]

Steady Freddie Lopez:
[to Palaka] This ain't over. Believe me. [to Zippy] Shut up!

Cissy Yost:
I'm moving my husband in here.

Ramon Gaviota:
So I see.

Tina Blake:
Would you like to go someplace?

Shaun Yost:
Sure.

Tina Blake:
Do you need to leave a message?

Shaun Yost:
I'll leave one at the store.

Mark Lewinsky:
Mercy Hospital's Head of Neurology has admitted to incompetence.

Meyer Dickstein:
You represent the hospital. Why give this to me?

Mark Lewinsky:
A good gesture. I wish to make the matter separate.

Dwayne:
My sole concern: How he infiltrated my domain?

Butchie Yost:
Because he's f***ing powerful. Right, Dwayne?

Bill Jacks:
What does soon mean? Could it mean a thousand years?

John Monad:
It could mean a thousand years

Bill Jacks:
[to Freddy] He's yours.

Bill Jacks:
Did you kill him?

Steady Freddie Lopez:
Shape shifters.

Bill Jacks:
You don't know what the f*** he is?

Steady Freddie Lopez:
No, but whatever the f*** he is. He's got to come true for us.

Cissy Yost:
He's alright. The Porn Queen had him at Sea World.

Cissy Yost:
If he's old enough to be with her, I'm singing him tonight with Linc.

Kai:
[to Jerri] Cissy, Queen of Ball Buster's Yost. Tell her to f*** herself, I quit.

Cass:
[to John] What have you got me in the middle of, John? What is it that you have me working on so I don't remember anything?

Tina Blake:
Shaun wants me to stay in I.B. Would you be okay with that?

Butchie Yost:
Yeah, I'd be okay with it.

[first lines]

John Monad:
Some day yesterday, Cass. Yesterday was a three-ring circus. I'm going to b with my Father today. My Father has more 'big and huge' for me. Without the zeroes and ones, Cass, the big and the huge don't mean dick.

Butchie Yost:
Still broomin' the spider webs of our website?

Dwayne:
Twelve hundred and forty four hits. Twelve hundred and forty four hits in like twenty four hours.

Butchie Yost:
No, sh*t!

Dwayne:
[Dwayne is speculating as to how popular his Yost website has become] It's the halo effect from Shaun.

Butchie Yost:
Far out!

Dwayne:
I don't suppose you'd like to come with me?

Butchie Yost:
[to Dwayne] Nah, I got a butt plug exploiting my portal.

Dwayne:
So, don't even try to live green?

Butchie Yost:
You got it, my brother.

Wonder Boy:
The Brazilian's got a boner for our shoes.

Linc Stark:
Really? You got a boner?

Linc Stark:
[to Wonder Boy] I'll tell you something else. That kid was saved by a miracle.

Cissy Yost:
[to Mark Lewinsky] Get out of my store. You're going to get kicked in the balls!

Butchie Yost:
[to Shaun] Me being a f***-up doesn't mean I shouldn't try to give you good advice.

Tina Blake:
[to Linc] A really good friend of yours wants to pay me to ruin your life.

Barry Cunningham:
You're going to be fine.

Palaka:
Thanks.

Shaun Yost:
[to Bill] I wish Zippy wouldn't have kissed me.

Dwayne:
The number of hits on Butchie's site is the halo effect.

Steady Freddy Lopez:
[to Palaka] Don't you f***ing die.

Kai:
[to Butchie] I saw you in the water this morning.

Butchie Yost:
Yeah?

Kai:
I've got your boards outside.

Bill Jacks:
[leaving message on Butchie's voice mail] Shaunie's here with me. So you may just want to call and get over.

Jake Ferris:
Do you have any children, Tina?

Tina Blake:
One. Shaun Yost. I gave him away the day he was born.

Jake Ferris:
And do you know who Shaun's Father was?

Tina Blake:
Yes, I f***ing know who his Father is. Butchie Yost. I left Shaunie with Butchie's parents.

Jake Ferris:
And what do you do for a living?

Tina Blake:
Adult film actress.

Jake Ferris:
Do you know Linc Stark?

Tina Blake:
Yes.

Jake Ferris:
How did you meet him?

Tina Blake:
He picked me up.

Jake Ferris:
And do you have a contractual arrangement with Linc Stark involving your son, Shaun Yost?

Tina Blake:
He's offered me a contractual arrangement.

Tina Blake:
Are you asking me to fib?

Jake Ferris:
Are you asking me to write you another check? 'Cause I will if you will.

Dr. Michael Smith:
[to Freddie] Stop trying to force an outcome because you're upset about your friend.

John Monad:
[Cass is hugging John] Shaun will be gone soon.

[last lines]

Linc Stark:
[to Tina] How much is that worth? 'Cause the big money is in escrow for whoever can tell me what the f*** is going on.

Cissy Yost:
God damn it!

Mark Lewinsky:
[to Cissy] I am a council for Mercy Hospital. I just need one signature to close Shaun's file. Departure against medical advice.

Dwayne:
[to Butchie] I think Shaun needs his own site.

Dwayne:
[to Butchie about Shaun getting his own site] If Shaun doesn't do it, whoever sponsors him will, and he'll end up getting used like some street whore.

Butchie Yost:
[to Shaun] Put the joint out.

Butchie Yost:
[to Shaun] Dwayne wants to talk to you about some informational superhighway sh*t.

Shaun Yost:
[to Butchie about Dwayne] You signed me over to Grandma and Gramps. Tell him to go talk to them.

Steady Freddy Lopez:
If he was really sick, you'd take him to the hospital right?

Dr. Michael Smith:
Try to remember, how I practiced before I met you.

Cissy Yost:
[to John] You were right about being more miserable.

John Monad:
[to Cissy] Getting dusted won't be an issue.

Jake Ferris:
[to Linc] Linc, the money wants you out. You made the company, I'd like to see you go with your pockets full, but you are gone, Linc.

Linc Stark:
What's their number to buy me out?

Jake Ferris:
Thirty five million.

Linc Stark:
Sixty five.

Tina Blake:
How did that go?

Linc Stark:
Turned the tables on that cock sucker, thanks to your wiley ways.

Linc Stark:
[to Tina] For a million, can I hold your hand?

[first lines]

Steady Freddie Lopez:
What are you doing? F***ing homicidal prick!

Butchie Yost:
[to Cissy] I'm gonna go look for that nut, that guy... My friend John.

Mitch Yost:
[to Cass] Sometimes to save what you love, you have to be willing to lose it. It's like surfing. If you do it for the wrong reasons, for the points, it's just a dead game.

Kai:
[to John] John, are you dumping out? John?

Palaka:
[to Freddy] "Is two days off a crime? Do I ever get to f***ing relax?" That was you, boss, in your sleep during the night.

Steady Freddie Lopez:
I don't talk in my sleep.

Cass:
F*** you. F*** you.

Linc Stark:
[about Mitch] The correct answer would be, "While you, Linc, are signing Cissy, I'm going to try to settle him on moving out of his house for good".

Mexican:
So John from Cincinnati is starting to chip in.

Mexican:
You think this is a joke, caron?

John Monad:
I think this is a joke.

Mexican:
I'll cut your f***in' heart out!

John Monad:
Cut my f***in' heart out!

Mexican:
You don't think I'll cut you? I'll show you your heart while you die.

John Monad:
Show me my heart.

Mexican:
You ready to look, you f***?

John Monad:
I'm ready.

Mexican:
F*** you! F*** you! F***!

Cissy Yost:
[to Linc] You want to help? Stay. Do the dishes.

Bill Jacks:
[Bill has just picked up the day's morning paper from his floor] Look at this, Zip. This fills me with misgivings. Bandying words like 'Miracle' in the newspaper headline. This can only attract new types of sh*t heel into that boy's life, which wasn't short of sh*t heels before.

Bill Jacks:
[Bill is attempting to tear off a piece of Duct tape as it gets caught on a few of his teeth] There it is. That's it. That's the doomsday scenario. May this pain come to Clinton for disgracing the Oval Office. [Bill rips the tape off as fast as he can] Ooh! Jesus Christ! Jesus Christ!

Bill Jacks:
[Bill's doorbell rings] Hey, I'm in my underwear, and I don't want any magazines!

Bill Jacks:
[to Zippy] Okay, going out to help these two... Something new everyday.

Mitch Yost:
[to Cass] What do you think about my levitation?

John Monad:
Pull over, Joe. Joe, pull over. [John places Vietnam Joe's Hand over John's wound] You can help.

Ramon Gaviota:
Forget something, Doc?

Dr. Michael Smith:
I left my dignity.

Steady Freddie Lopez:
[to Bill] I could give less of a sh*t.

John Monad:
[to Joe] Tomorrow is another day, Joe.

Vietnam Joe:
I'm undertaking inquiries tomorrow! You can guarantee that goddamned much!

Bill Jacks:
Safe. I got my eye on you.

John Monad:
[to Dr. Smith] Tomorrow is another day.

John Monad:
I got my eye on you, Bill.

Butchie Yost:
Yost Surfing School: Twenty four hours I will have you in the water or in some p*ssy!

Steady Freddie Lopez:
[to Tina] You care to leave a message? On my face? With your ass?

Cissy Yost:
[Mitch approaches Cissy to ask about giving their relationship another chance. The two of them are separated by a storm door] Shall we try it again?

Mitch Yost:
Through the door?

Mitch Yost:
The joker in the deck.

John Monad:
I'd better have a good health plan.

Bill Jacks:
Where's the dwarf with the dangling arm?

Steady Freddie Lopez:
He is in our shared bathroom.

Mitch Yost:
She looks at me like he knows something about me that I haven't even known myself.

John Monad:
[to Cass] See God, Kai.

Cass:
[correcting him] Cass.

John Monad:
See God, Cass.

[last lines]

Steady Freddie Lopez:
I got a lizard back home. Changes shapes.

Bill Jacks:
Chameleons they call 'em

Bill Jacks:
You in trouble?

Butchie Yost:
No.

Bill Jacks:
Well my testicles are on display in the neighborhood. Get in here!

Butchie Yost:
You know that guy John is missing. I searched for him through Cincinnati.

Cass:
Your poor leg.

Mitch Yost:
Well, last night's as bad as it's gonna get.

Linc Stark:
[to Cissy] Where's Mitch?

Cissy Yost:
If seeing Shaun last night didn't convert you from a kind of a**hole who asks questions he knows the answers to.

Vietnam Joe:
[about John] I f***ing touched him and he healed.

Reporter with Camera, in Yost Boards:
How you feeling Shaun? How's your neck?

Cissy Yost:
F*** off! Newspaper a**hole!

Reporter with Camera, in Yost Boards:
Watch the camera lady.

Vietnam Joe:
[to John] Listen to me, Frat Boy. You're gonna tell me who it was. And I'm jumping in that van, drive into that jin mill, and I am gonna do some damage.

Cass:
You know, I don't think you stay here.

Mitch Yost:
Why?

Cass:
He needs a place to stay. I'll be right back.

Cass:
I threw Mitch out.

Linc Stark:
Good thinking.

Linc Stark:
[to Cass] You know, you're fired right? I mean, you're not that bone f***ing stupid to think I'd keep you on the payroll?

Bill Jacks:
My bird Zippy conveyed to me. Just because of obvious dissimilarities between us, we become friends.

Steady Freddie Lopez:
He used the word, dissimilarities.

Bill Jacks:
He conveyed. I never said he spoke.

Tina Blake:
I'm looking for Butchie Yost.

Bill Jacks:
Butchie's not here.

Bill Jacks:
Jesus Christ! Jesus Christ!

[first lines]

Kai:
[surfing in toward Mitch, who is on shore] Hey, old man!

Mitch Yost:
Watch your feet; I stepped on a syringe here yesterday.

Kai:
Yeah, welcome to the sloughs.

Kai:
[about Cass] Who's that chick? She a fan of yours?

Mitch Yost:
All my fans are in retirement homes.

Cass:
[to Mitch] I like vintage, what can I say?

Butchie Yost:
Are you shy about doin' your business, John?

John Monad:
I'm shy about doing my business.

Butchie Yost:
Sh*t, I haven't seen you dump or take a leak since you got here.

Linc Stark:
[to Shaun] I was a grom, just like you, once. Always in the water.

Vietnam Joe:
[about John] You think he may be a Mexican?

Butchie Yost:
I'm trying to get a line on him, Joe.

Kai:
[to Cass] Did you get Mitch in your Porsche? Show him how the gear box works?

Butchie Yost:
Leads me to believe that you're not from around here.

John Monad:
I'm not from around here, Butchie!

Butchie Yost:
Oh, yeah, no? Or any other metropolis for that matter. I'm feeling kinda, you know, a small town. Not a farm town, but a small town. A small town like a... I'm feeling a little Cincinnati.

John Monad:
I am from Cincinnati!

Butchie Yost:
Get the f*** out!

John Monad:
You get the f*** out!

Butchie Yost:
[Butchie receives a phone call from Mitch informing him of Shaun's accident] Yeah?

Mitch Yost:
You piece of sh*t! What's up with your phone?

Butchie Yost:
The battery died.

Mitch Yost:
Yeah, what a shock.

Butchie Yost:
Is that what you called to talk to me about, my f***ing phone?

Mitch Yost:
Shaunie broke his neck at Huntington.

Butchie Yost:
Is he gonna be alright?

Mitch Yost:
He broke his neck!

[repeated line]

John Monad:
What do you want, Butchie?

Dr. Michael Smith:
Our tests show that there is no electrical activity in Shaun's brain.

Mitch Yost:
[to the Doctor] So you're saying he's brain dead. You're saying there's nothing you can do.

Dr. Michael Smith:
I'm sorry. But I think that's the case.

Cissy Yost:
[about Shaun] He's breathing and I can hold him.

Mitch Yost:
Well, get a dog. He's dead. I want him off the machines.

John Monad:
[in the hospital] Did you dump out this morning?

Kai:
Uh-huh. You need to dump out?

John Monad:
[in the hospital] I just a took a dump a grown man would be proud of.

Kai:
At a boy.

Butchie Yost:
[to Bill, regarding Shaun] You've been more father to him than I was.

Bill Jacks:
Come on, Zip. Now, don't hold back on me, Pal.

Linc Stark:
[to remonstrative father] Your kid sticks one like that, you can come back and piss in my ear.

[last lines]

Bill Jacks:
That's it, Zip. That's it. Kiss Shauny too, as long as you're being stupid. Jesus, Mary and Joseph.

Mitch Yost:
What the hell are you doing here?

Linc Stark:
Shaun's back in. At Huntington.

Mitch Yost:
You muscled him back in.

Cissy Yost:
[to Mitch] Just this once, Mitch. Think what Shaun wants.

Cass:
[to Mitch] Mitch Yost. I'm doing this film. It's called Legends. I'd like to shoot you for it.

Linc Stark:
[on the phone] I can't believe she saw you hitting on Mitch, this morning.

Cass:
[on the phone] You know, Linc. I actually do make films.

Linc Stark:
[on the phone] That's what your supposed to make her think.

Linc Stark:
[on the phone] I'll see you at Huntington.

Cass:
[on the phone] Yeah, you'll see me, but you won't f***ing to me.

Meyer Dickstein:
[to Steady Freddie] Motel's closed. Changing ownership.

Steady Freddie Lopez:
Butchie Yost?

Ramon Gaviota:
He's in Number F.

Butchie Yost:
Hey Freddie. [Freddie punches him] Mother f***er!

Barry Cunningham:
The Motel is haunted.

Meyer Dickstein:
[to Barry] You mentioned you had an unpleasant experience.

Ramon Gaviota:
[to Barry] You won't have to go in that room no more.

Meyer Dickstein:
F*** Room Twenty Four.

Cissy Yost:
[to Mitch] Watch this. He's got it won. Hands down.

Kai:
He didn't come up! He never came up!

Cissy Yost:
You take Shauny off that machine, Mitch, I'll murder you in your sleep.

[first lines]

Bill Jacks:
He's much improved. Shaun. He's well. I had Zippy kiss him. Thought I'd take a shot.

Dr. Michael Smith:
[to Cissy and Butchie] Shaun has recovered. Once I get the tube out of his throat, I'll come back and we should talk.

Cissy Yost:
We can't come in now?

Dr. Michael Smith:
Not until the tubes out. It can become uncomfortable for relatives to watch.

John Monad:
[to Kai] I took a dump. Zippy kissed him. Shaun's much improved and well. No, no, I got my eye on you. The end is near.

Linc Stark:
I know. You told me.

John Monad:
I'd like to bone you, Kai.

Kai:
You are one smooth-talking city dude.

Barry Cunningham:
Do you hear the dead man singing within, gentlemen?

Ramon Gaviota:
I'm half deaf from the leaf-blower.

Barry Cunningham:
No, attorney Dickstein?

Meyer Dickstein:
Uh, surfer's ear. Existosis of the ear canal.

Barry Cunningham:
I, alone, then am favored by the jovially croaking post-coital falsetto winsomely caricaturing Debbie Boone? [singing softly]... you give me hope... to carry on... [Reaches in and quickly slams the door to Room Twenty Four]

Ramon Gaviota:
[to Meyer Dickstein] Maybe we should get him some pea soup...

Bill Jacks:
[Bill is looking out the Yost's family window at the mass of people] Gawkers. Press. Candle Freaks. We're on the precipice of a cluster f***. I'm thinking I'll go out and thin it out.

Cissy Yost:
I'd appreciate it.

Bill Jacks:
[reluctantly] Happy to do it.

John Monad:
I'm gonna bone Kai, Butchie. I may have to break her jaw first.

Kai:
No float boning. We'll just clear off a couch.

Butchie Yost:
Make her see God, John.

John Monad:
I'm gonna try hard enough.

Cissy Yost:
[about John] Where is that guy from?

Butchie Yost:
Cincinnati.

[Cissy has asked Shaun to stay in his bedroom. Butchie enters Shaun's room where he is reading surfing magazines]

Shaun Yost:
Why does Gram want me to?

Butchie Yost:
Well, she saw you get hurt.

Shaun Yost:
I'm okay now.

Butchie Yost:
[with extreme emphasis] You were hurt. Hey, you remember anything, you know, after you wiped out? You got f***ing doned, man. Owned hard. You know, Grams and Gramps, too. They thought you weren't going to make it. [pauses] A lot of people.

Shaun Yost:
I woke up. I had a tube in.

Butchie Yost:
[points to a man in one of Shaun's surfer magazines] One time I put Icy Hot in the crouch of this guy's wet suit!

Shaun Yost:
And Bill was there and Zippy.

Butchie Yost:
And then you got better. Before that, I didn't think you could.

Shaun Yost:
Zippy was dead the day before yesterday.

Butchie Yost:
You thought he was dead.

Cissy Yost:
So dad was full of instructions. Did he tell you to break your neck for the second time today?

Shaun Yost:
Gram, I feel like a dork in there laying around.

Cissy Yost:
Well isn't that too goddamned bad! You listen to me! Don't listen to that f***ing idiot!

Cissy Yost:
Did you build that half-pipe?

Butchie Yost:
No, Mom. You did.

Cissy Yost:
[screaming and crying] And what you did was blow smoke into the phone! Yeah Ma, be right there Ma, sorry I couldn't help Ma! I didn't even tell Shaunie you were coming over because I knew what the odds were. Where's my Dad, Grams, where's my Dad? Now you want him to break his neck.

Kai:
We're boning now, aren't we?

John Monad:
Now were boning, Kai!

Kai:
Boning, John, is when you put your joint in my p*ssy. That's your joint, here's my p*ssy.

John Monad:
Now we're boning.

Kai:
[to John] Has anyone ever called you slow, John? Challenged?

John Monad:
See God, Kai.

Kai:
If that's what it's like, I don't want to.

John Monad:
That's what it's like.

Mitch Yost:
Why did she bring him home?

Bill Jacks:
He recovered from his injuries.

Mitch Yost:
What are you talking about?

Bill Jacks:
A miracle. [Mitch departs, Bill is speaking to himself] What are you gonna say - Tell him that the bird kissed him... Jesus Christ, almighty!

Bill Jacks:
[looking at Vietnam Joe] There's another f***ing drug casualty.

Dr. Michael Smith:
So how is Shaun?

Cissy Yost:
Breaking my balls to let him skate.

Dr. Michael Smith:
Well, I take that as a good sign.

Dr. Michael Smith:
So, was I dead or something?

Shaun Yost:
You were pretty banged up when they brought you in, Shaun. Obviously you're fine. But if I had any doubts, I'd restrict your activities.

Dr. Michael Smith:
Did you think I was going to die?

Shaun Yost:
No, Sir. No, I did not.

Butchie Yost:
Whatever that means, Doc, I'm busted for being a dope fiend.

Dr. Michael Smith:
Why would that make you ineligible for a paranormal experience? And as Shaun's Father, maybe your eligibility has enhanced.

Butchie Yost:
You've met my old man, right?

Dr. Michael Smith:
Mitch.

Butchie Yost:
Up in the air yesterday. I saw it with my own eyes. Off the f***ing ground.

[last lines]

Kai:
[a large crowd has gathered to watch Shaun skateboard in his backyard] What's going on, John?

John Monad:
See God, Kai.

John Monad:
[to Bill] I got my eye on you.

Cass:
Can I ask how your grandson's doing?

Mitch Yost:
He's gonna die. My wife doesn't want me up there. Gotta leave her the car.

Cass:
I can give you a ride, if you want.

Dr. Michael Smith:
[to Shaun] If you understand me, just blink once for yes, twice for no.

Dr. Michael Smith:
[to Cissy] No hospital is equipped to deal with what happened to your grandson.

Cissy Yost:
[to Dr. Smith] So you're saying we should take him home?

Cass:
[to Mitch] Come to my hotel.

Bill Jacks:
I have to ask you your business with the Yosts?

Steady Freddie Lopez:
My business is none of your business.

Bill Jacks:
Do not impede me looking out for these people, dip sh*t, who looks like someone smashed his face in with a board.

Kai:
[to John] My piercings feel like they were in a furnace! Don't do that to me again! Ever. You f***in' hear me?

Butchie Yost:
Motherf***er!

Cissy Yost:
You want to see Shaun?

Mitch Yost:
I just assumed Shaunie not see me this f***ed up.

Cissy Yost:
Anyways, we're a little busy here.

Mitch Yost:
Which is another way of saying we do need time apart.

Butchie Yost:
I'm having problems with my implants, Doc. I passed out I got that f***ing high.

Dr. Michael Smith:
Sensations of burning can be caused by I.V. drug use.

Butchie Yost:
[about John] The guys shows up at my door. Creates money in his pants.

Linc Stark:
[seeing Shaun skate] Jesus Christ!

Palaka:
I don't know. Not why I asked you not to sell to him, not why I flew out here to see shape-changers in a rear-view mirror...

Cissy Yost:
[to Shaun] Did he tell you to break your neck for the second time today?

Kai:
[to John] You know, if we did bone, I'd feel like I was getting over on a hot slow guy.

Mitch Yost:
I'll take whatever time I have to, to live into what that means.

Kai:
What does "bone" mean, John?

John Monad:
I don't know, Butchie instead.

Butchie Yost:
[to Dr. Smith] I should be on the floor dope-sick, and I don't feel that bad.