Tales of the Wizard of Oz

Rusty the Tin Man:
[reading a book on law] The first thing a lawyer should do at the scene of an accident is run and yell. Hmmm, makes sense.

Dandy Lion:
[Teaching Socrates how to dance ballet] Now the first thing you need to do is relax. [Socrates lies down on the floor as if to go to sleep]

Dandy Lion:
I SAID RELAX, NOT COLAPSE!

Socrates the Scarecrow:
[Getting ready to foot race against the wicked Witch of the West] Okay, well go on three. 1,2...

The wicked Witch of the West:
[cutting in] 1 and 2 make 3. Let's go.

Wizard of Oz:
[after being distracted from casting a spell] Distractions! Distractions! Interruptions! Interruptions!

Theme Song:
They're three sad souls. Oh me! Oh my! No Brains, no heart, he's much too shy. But never mind you three. Here's the Wizard as you can see. He'll fix that, one two three. In the funny place called the world of Oz. Oh the world of Oz is a very, funny place. Where everyone wears a funny, funny face. All the streets are paved with gold. And no one ever grows old. In that funny land lives the Wizard of Oz.

"You don't say?"

"You don't say?!"

"YOU DON'T SAY?!"

other:
"Who was that?"

"He didn't say."

Rusty:
"I knew a couple who owned an Iron & Steel company. The wife irons, the husband steals!"

Time for this one to come home