The John Larroquette Show

[a gang member is offering John a service]

Iceman:
For a certain price the Iceman can provide you with... protection

John:
Really? How much to have you provide... ice?

Iceman:
Now listen, man

John:
No! You listen! I have a party in two hours and I need a thousand cubes and a couple of blocks. Can you help me or not?

Tony Hemingway:
[points to a sign on John's wall that reads: "This is a Dark Ride"] I heard about this.

John:
Yeah. From the carnival. A pretty fair description of life too, I think.

Officer Eve Eggers:
Nobody gets me.

[Mahalia and Catherine are wearing matching red dresses]

John:
You two look like the Linda Ronstadt "Then and Now" album cover.

Unknown singer:
[played while Dexter drive John] Kill whitey! kill whitey!

John:
What's the name of the song?

Dexter Walker:
"Justice".

Dexter Walker:
[Cop pulls car over. Dexter quickly turns music off, then turns to face cop at the driver's window] Evenin', officer.

Unknown singer:
[John reaches over and turns music back on] Kill whitey! kill whitey!

John:
[as he is about to have a drink with his new neighbor Carly] Cheers.

Carly Watkins:
Seinfeld.

John Hemingway:
[as he is about to have a drink with his new neighbor Carly] Cheers.

Carly Watkins:
Seinfeld.