The Six Wives of Henry VIII

Lady Rochford:
I married a jelly.

George, Viscount Rochford:
And I a tight-lipped b*tch!

Anne Boleyn:
I am innocent, that is sure. And I am a victim. That, too, is sure. This whole mockery is unworthy of you, uncle. It is unworthy of you as representative of my gentle husband. This trial is no trial, but a signature on a document. The poorest subject is given justice that I am denied. I am the Queen and entitled to better than you have given me. Accusations, papers, lies are easy means of denying the truth to a court of men. But the truth shall be known in that court which shall judge us all in time. I am sorry for you, Cromwell, for in condemning me, you condemn yourself elsewhere. Give your verdict, gentlemen, but remember I am your Queen.

Lady Boleyn:
The King will remember what you are to him.

Anne Boleyn:
They're not building that scaffold for nothing.

Lady Boleyn:
I am sure he will remember.

Anne Boleyn:
I know my husband! He is a hunter...

Lady Boleyn:
Madam...

Anne Boleyn:
When he has sported, he will kill. 'Tis his nature. And I am the prey.

Anne Boleyn:
I would like to confess to Cranmer. He shall bear that burden. He shall know my innocence.

Thomas Cromwell:
Go and hear her confess. Better you than some priest with a conscience!

Anne Boleyn:
[after confessing her innocence] You will say nothing of what happened today?

Archbishop Thomas Cranmer:
I can say nothing.

Anne Boleyn:
And you know my innocence, for what it is.

Archbishop Thomas Cranmer:
I wish to God I had never known.

Anne of Cleves:
I could call myself Your Majesty's most loyal and obedient sister.

Henry VIII:
I like her not.

Anne of Cleves:
I would rather comfort a shamed child than save a dozen churches.

Archbishop Thomas Cranmer:
My lord Earl.

Thomas Cromwell:
Not you, Archbishop. Stand silent a little.

Archbishop Thomas Cranmer:
My Lord.

Thomas Cromwell:
For a learned man, you're mighty slow in your wits, you've done some shameful things in your life and likely to do more before you die, so how is it I find such comfort in you?

Archbishop Thomas Cranmer:
Comfort I never have any to give.

Thomas Cromwell:
No! I fancy when that King in there, that arrogant bag of diseased guts and crazed pride, at last comes to die, he will only go in peace if he has your hand in his.

Archbishop Thomas Cranmer:
What comfort can you need?

Thomas Cromwell:
I've seen the warrants ready and the pen dipped to sign them. Few could have been favoured with such clear notice of their deaths. Will you pay a debt for me, Archbishop?

Archbishop Thomas Cranmer:
You have credit with me.

Thomas Cromwell:
Stay, Tom, until the Queen leaves the King tonight. Whatever happens, there will be a lady in dire need of comfort.

Archbishop Thomas Cranmer:
Comfort again and my hands so empty... What will happen?

Thomas Cromwell:
The more I know of that Lady of Cleves, the more I wonder.

Henry VIII:
So who's it to be? I've lost myself in all these princesses.

Thomas Cromwell:
The Duke of Cleves has two sisters...

Henry VIII:
Yes, I remember a fair girl, flaxen, that would be pleasing. For, mark you Cromwell, the girl must be bed-worthy, I'm man as well as king.

Thomas Cromwell:
No one doubts it, sir, but I fancy it is not the flaxen lady to whom we are chiefly concerned; that would be the Princess Amelia the younger sister, our first approach mentioned the elder sister the Princess Anna.

Henry VIII:
[on learning the truth about Catherine] So young, so beautiful... yet so corrupt.

Henry VIII:
You must surely know that a fresh husband is expected to do more than just look at his bride.

Catherine Howard:
Lady Rochford's husband spent the night in prayer.

Henry VIII:
Had I been Lady Rochford's husband, I would have done the same!

Henry VIII:
You have our permission to leave immediately, I say. You may go to the south or the north or wherever you will until the end of your days. You are the source of infection, Norfolk, you are the disease. If I ever hear you again it will be to condemn you. If I ever see you it will only be to look upon your head.

Lady Rochford:
They say the king is a very Turk with women. You will have very little rest tonight, my angel. Let him do as he likes, child.

Lady Rochford:
You will not appoint Dereham as your private secretary?

Catherine Howard:
You where listening behind the door.

Lady Rochford:
I only heard the word "secretary". Besides, I can hold my tongue to keep my head.

Catherine Howard:
And so must Dereham hold his.

Duke of Norfolk:
Are you a Howard child? A true Howard?

Dowager Duchess of Norfolk:
She is stubborn enough.

Duke of Norfolk:
And by God she is pretty enough.

Henry VIII:
[admonishing the fool Will Somers, as his doctors are treating his ulcerated leg] And you hold your tongue or I'll have these butchers cut it out of your head.

Bishop Gardiner:
Oh, Mistress Askew. I'll be your friend.

Anne Askew:
Thus said Judas.

Catherine Parr:
My lord, I do not see your children in court.

Henry VIII:
My children?

Catherine Parr:
They say you have put aside the Lady Mary and the Lady Elizabeth because the sight of them troubles you.

Henry VIII:
They say? Who says?

Catherine Parr:
It is said, my lord.

Henry VIII:
I love my daughters!

[pauses]

Henry VIII:
I'll bring them back, Kate, if you will mother them.

Catherine Parr:
Sire?

Henry VIII:
Oh, by Our Lady, madam, are we playing tennis? Will you marry me?

[Catherine is silent]

Henry VIII:
Well, madam, you knew that I would ask you.

Catherine Parr:
Yes, sire.

Henry VIII:
I told Cranmer to prepare you, and the Bishop Winchester.

Catherine Parr:
They prayed with me, sire.

Henry VIII:
Oh, God, did it need praying over?

Henry VIII:
[to Catherine] Your face is as long as a barber's pole and your expression as sour as vinegar.

Thomas Seymour:
[to Queen Catherine Parr, mocking King Henry] Gentle! That mountain of lard and stinking sores.

Henry VIII:
I love my daughters. I'll bring them back, Kate, if you will mother them.

Catherine Parr:
Sire?

Henry VIII:
Madam, are we playing tennis? Will you marry me? Well, madam, you knew that I would ask you.

Catherine Parr:
Yes, sire.

Henry VIII:
I told Cranmer to prepare you, the Bishop Winchester.

Catherine Parr:
They prayed with me, sire.

Henry VIII:
Oh God, did it need praying over?

Catherine of Aragon:
While my husband lives, I am his wife. His own true wife.

Henry VIII:
I can bring a hundred learned men to prove that you are not my wife!

Catherine of Aragon:
Bring your hundred learned men! I can bring a thousand learned men from all over Europe to prove that I am you wife, I always have been your wife and I always will be!

Catherine of Aragon:
I would rather die than go back to Spain unmarried. I would rather die!

Henry VIII:
I promise you that no one will be unkind to you again. Word of a king.

Catherine of Aragon:
I would rather have word of a Henry.

Henry VIII:
Word of a Henry!

Jane Seymour:
[referring to Robert Aske's rebellion] I beg you, sir, by the deep love I bear you, I beg you to restore the abbeys. This can only be God's judgment for putting them down!

Henry VIII:
God and my conscience are on perfectly good terms, madam. And unless you wish to follow Mistress Boleyn's end, you will not meddle in my affairs!

Henry VIII:
[to Jane] If you had your way, my little nun, every prisoner in the kingdom would go free!

Thomas Cromwell:
You want your sister crowned queen, Master Seymour? Leave it to me. I'm an old hand at it.

Henry VIII:
[Henry and Cromwell are discussing a new wife following the death of Jane Seymour] Princess Madeleine?

Thomas Cromwell:
Yes, Your Majesty?

Henry VIII:
Or this Mary de Guise?

Thomas Cromwell:
Already spoken for by your nephew James, sir.

Henry VIII:
Well, does that matter? Yes, perhaps.