Blonde and Blonder

[first lines]

Dee Twiddle:
Oh, something's back there. [pointing at toilet paper]

Dawn St. Dom:
Oh, you've got one, too. [grabbing paper seat cover]

Golf Announcer:
Ladies and gentlemen, an airplane has just made a hole-in-one.

Dee Twiddle:
[emerging] We come in peace.

Dawn St. Dom:
What are we listening to?

Dee Twiddle:
That's the Sound of Music.

Dawn St. Dom:
Oh cool. What's the music called?

Dee Twiddle:
How long have you lived here?

Dawn St. Dom:
None months. How about you?

Dee Twiddle:
Oh, not nearly that long. About a year.

Dee Twiddle:
That's my dream, I want to have my own a turtle orphanage. And I want to dance in a Broadway play.

Dawn St. Dom:
I got fired for typos.

Dee Twiddle:
What are typos?

Dawn St. Dom:
I have no idea...

Dee Twiddle:
Are you ready for Wong?

Dawn St. Dom:
How can I not be when it feels so right?

Dawn St. Dom:
[gambling] This is the most fun I've had with my clothes on!

[last lines]

Dee Twiddle:
Turtles can teach us a lot.

Virgil the Turtle:
[farts]

Tour Kid:
I already know how to do that.