Get Real

Steven Carter:
It's only love. What's everyone so scared of?

Steven Carter:
Hate me, loathe me, detest me - just faint!

Steven Carter:
Love ? Why do you care about my love?

Jessica:
It's not a gay story, it's a pervert story.

Kevin:
What's the difference?

Wendy:
You're not gay and you're a pervert.

Linda:
Now don't you start!

Steven Carter:
I'm sorry, I was thinking of someone else.

Linda:
Charming!

John Dixon:
Guess what?

Steven Carter:
You're pregnant!

Linda:
He's sex on legs!

John Dixon:
Well f*** me! No, no, I don't mean... I just mean... f*** me... but not... well what I mean is...

Wendy:
Romeo, Romeo, cover me in honey and suck it off with a straw.

Jessica:
What?

Wendy:
God. He's perfect.

Jessica:
Fancy him do you?

Wendy:
He can pass me his baton any day.

Wendy:
So. Where shall we go?

Mark:
Fancy a Whopper?

Wendy:
Sure. We can always eat afterwards.

Mark:
She seems quite distant sometimes. It's killing me. We're talking permanent erection here. There's a medical term for that. Isn't there?

Steven Carter:
Uh, Yeah..."Sad Bastard"

Linda's Brother:
Linda. Mom says if you don't come in for your tea now, she'll give it to the dog.

Linda:
OK, OK.

Steven Carter:
You haven't got a dog.

Linda's Brother:
Well, We'll get one.

Steven Carter:
I came late to sex. I was nearly ten. That's when my friend Mark Watkins told me how babies were made.

Young Steve:
Really? Are you sure?

Young Mark:
Yeah. Honest. I saw it on one of my dad's videos.

Steven Carter:
For over a year after that I thought babies were made when two women tied a man to a bed and covered his willy with ice cream.

Kevin:
Weren't you listening in there, Jes? Careful, you don't know what you might catch. Forget him. He's a...

Jessica:
He's a what? Poof? Queer? F*ggot? Anything else you can think of?

Steven's Mother:
I'll tell you what else he is. He's my son, and I'm very proud of him. And if you do anything to hurt him, I'll have your bollocks for earrings.