Psycho Beach Party

Florence "Chicklet" Forrest:
Guys only want one thing. I'm going to the snack bar, want a wiener?

Berdine:
They look like beatniks, should I unpack my bongos?

MarvelAnn:
I intend to unpack mine.

Captain Monica Stark:
Strange that the victim had only one testicle stuffed in his mouth. I believe they usually come in pairs.

Cookie:
Well, that's cuz he only had one. I checked. Plenty of meat, only one potato.

Kanaka:
Mistress Ann, I've been a bad boy.

Florence "Chicklet" Forrest:
And bad boys get spanked. Bad boys get tortured!

Kanaka:
Cowabunga!

Mrs. Forrest:
I believe this is what you kids call a gang bang!

Rhonda:
Hey, is it true you're going to Europe at the end of the summer?

Florence "Chicklet" Forrest:
No, we just have a Swedish exchange student living with us.

Rhonda:
Oh, I heard you were going to Denmark.

Florence "Chicklet" Forrest:
Where'd ya get that idea?

Rhonda:
I heard you were going there to have some sort of an operation.

Florence "Chicklet" Forrest:
An operation?

Rhonda:
Yeah, I heard you were having your dick cut off and turning into a girl.

Rhonda:
Kisses.

Provoloney:
Why you picking on us? We didn't do nothin' wrong.

Captain Monica Stark:
Because I don't like you. Don't like the way ya talk. I don't like the way ya walk. Don't like ya haircut. You kids think ya own this beach- think it's a teenage world. Well, you're dead wrong!

Lars/Larry:
I'm having trouble with my pants- whenever I put my hand in the pocket, I feel a little prick.

Mrs. Forrest:
You'll never get away with this, motherf***ing cocksuckers!

Captain Monica Stark:
Frankly, Dr. Edwards, in the past, I've had little use for you headshrinkers, inkblot tests, "I hate my mother" and all that crap. But with this case, I find myself at a lost. I understand you specialize in the treatment of homicidal maniacs.

Dr. Edwards:
Yes, well, I've never been involved in a criminal investigation.

Captain Monica Stark:
Hmm. Don't worry. You can leave the cops and robbers stuff to me. What I need from you is this: what kind of sicko am I looking for?

Dr. Edwards:
The perpetrator preys upon vulnerable unfortunates the killers deems somehow flawed.

Captain Monica Stark:
Give me a profile.

Dr. Edwards:
Let's say the assailant is highly sophisticated, yet childlike. Vulnerable but canny.

Dr. Edwards:
Capable of both tenderness and extreme brutality.

Dr. Edwards:
The murderer is highly intelligent, yet strangely out of touch with reality.

Dr. Edwards:
Sexual, yet surprisingly innocent.

Dr. Edwards:
This individual has an insatiable craving for normalcy, which will make your investigation all the more difficult.

Captain Monica Stark:
How so?

Dr. Edwards:
Because the killer will do everything in his power to pass as normal.

Dr. Edwards:
He or she could be anyone.

Berdine:
No one understands Bettina. Her screen persona is a brilliant comment on the socio-political structure of stardom.

Florence "Chicklet" Forrest:
You get all that from a pizza waitress with three heads? I guess we are the only ones watching the movie.

Kanaka:
Still walking the straight and narrow-minded?

Starcat:
Kid, listen to it in high-fidelity, stereophonic sound: surfing's a man's domain. No minnows in the shark tank.

Captain Monica Stark:
Well, here we are at another murder. I'd rather we met for minature golf.

Mrs. Forrest:
Show me a subpoena, flatfoot.