Alvin and the Chipmunks: Chipwrecked

Dave:
"ALLLLLLLLLVIIIIIIIIIIIIIN!"

Dave:
"No, there's no plank, but if you guys disobey me one more time, you will be off the ship. And you'll miss the International Music Awards. Do you understand?"

Dave:
(Chasing Alvin, and losing him, shouts into a microphone) ALLLLLLLLLVIIIIIIIIIIIIIN!

Theodore:
Um, Eleanor, would you like to dance?

Eleanor:
I'd love to.

Theodore:
With me?

Eleanor:
(throws her clutches) Yes, Theodore!

Brittany:
Simon, where do you find the gold bracelet?

Simon:
What gold bracelet?

Brittany:
That you give to Jeanette.

Simon:
When did I gave Jeanette a bracelet?

Brittany:
On your date.

Simon:
(gasp) JEANETTE AND I ARE DATING?!

Brittany:
Okay, he's useless.

Alvin:
Come on! Please! Help me save my dad.

Zoe:
You're not coming back up until you have every last bit of that tresure!

Jeanette:
B-B-B-But... the volcano is about to explode!

Zoe:
Then I guess you better hurry then, huh?

Jeanette:
(when Simone confront her and grap her hand) W-What are you doing?

Simone:
What I wanted to do the moment I laid my eyes all over on you. (starts dancing with Jeanette)

Alvin:
SIMON!!!

Brittany:
Uh, Alvin? You're starting to sound like Dave.

Alvin:
(shocked) NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

Alvin:
We're alive! We're alive!

Brittany:
Good. 'Cause now... (turns around; briefly pauses) I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!!

Simon:
Guys, guys, guys! Nobody is killing anyone, okay? [Unhappily gritting his teeth to Alvin] No matter how much he deserves it.

Alvin:
[Sarcastically] Thank you, Si.

Alvin:
(To Brittany) I'll be sure to save you the pit! (chuckles; then smashes into tree) Oh, my acorns!

Dave:
When are you gonna stop acting like a child?

Alvin:
When are you going to stop treating me like a child?

Dave:
I'll stop treating you like a child when you start acting like a grownup.

Alvin:
I'll start acting like a grownup when you start-

[The Chipettes enter, singing a parody of "Whip My Hair as the Chipmunks beatbox along.]

Dave:
Girls, not now, please. Okay?

[Alvin is providing commentary on Brittany's shuffleboarding move, much to her annoyance]

Alvin:
Brittany approaches her puck... adjusts her stance... looks over at me quite annoyed... wonders to herself if I'm ever going to shut my mouth... realizes I'm not...and makes her move...

[Brittany misses]

Alvin:
And... OH! Oh, it's short! [laughs] A costly error, ladies and gentlemen! That's going to haunt her the rest of her career!

Brittany:
[laughs sarcastically] You can make all the jokes you want, Alvin, but not even you can make this interesting.

Simon:
Listen, lady. Maybe you should leave us alone, so we could focus more on surviving and less on killing ourselves.

Zoe:
Oh... [chuckles] That is a lot of uptight in a very little package.

Simon:
I'm not uptight! I just don't wanna see one else getting hur– [something bites him] OW!

[The thing that bit Simon turns out to be a spider]

Simon:
Criminy. What was that?

Zoe:
Oh, you know what? That was just a spider and they live here, because this is nature.

Simon:
This is not just a spider! That's a "phoneutria bahiensis"; its bite contains a neurotoxin!

Alvin:
Ooh, Mr. Fancy Words. So what?

Simon:
Alvin, toxin: poison, neuro: brain?

Alvin:
Oh, that's not good.

Simon:
Uh, side effects include... changes in personality, loss of inhibition, dry mouth...

Zoe:
Okay, calm down. I get bitten probably twice a day by these little fellas and I am still completely normal.

Alvin:
[in disbelief] Yes, normal.

Simon:
Oh, no...

Alvin:
SIMON!!!

Brittany:
Uh, Alvin? You're starting to sound like Dave.

Alvin:
[shocked] NOOOOOOO!!!

[As the Chipmunks and Chipettes perform at the International Music Awards]

Ian:
It's good to be back, huh?

Dave:
Sure is.

Ian:
Sold Zoe's story to Hollywood. Huge bidding war. Keira Knightley's interested. Nothing can... bit a cent from me?

[Last lines:
Dave, the Chipmunks and the Chipettes are flying home; Dave tries to put the chipmunks' tiny suitcases in the overhead locker]

Flight Attendant:
I'm sorry, sir. That's full. We're gonna have to gate check those.

Dave:
[sighs] Are you gonna charge me $25 a bag?

Flight Attendant:
Of course not, sir. It's $25 for the first bag, and $40 for each additional bag.

Jeanette:
[shivering in her seat] I'm a little chilly, would you mind adjusting the vent?

Simon:
But of course.

[Simon jumps up to adjust the vent, but pushes a book before Brittany aside while landing]

Brittany:
Oh, you wrinkled my business magazine!

Simon:
Heh, sorry.

Brittany:
[pushes book aside revealing a magazine with herself on the cover] Guess I'll have to read this. Oh, she's pretty. Oh wait, that's me.

Dave:
Alright, head count.

Theodore:
[appears wearing a monster costume made out of a bag] BOO! [roars until Dave removes the bag] You like my jungle monster costume? Eleanor made it for me.

Eleanor:
Yeah! Out of the barf bag!

Dave:
Yeah, nice. [tosses bag aside and does a head count] Where's Alvin?

Alvin:
[over intercom] Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking: we're cleared for an untimed departure for Timbuktu. If Timbuktu is not for you, please alert the flight attendant by pressing your call button.

[The passengers do so]

Dave:
Alvin...

Alvin:
[frantically] Thank you for choosing Air Alvin, uh...enjoy your flight!

Flight Attendant:
Sir, please return to your seat, we're about to take off.

[Alvin jumps off the food cart, accidentally pressing the release lever]

Flight Attendant:
Sit, now!

Alvin:
Uh-oh.

Dave:
But he–

Flight Attendant:
Sit!

[The cart rolls down the aisle]

Dave:
No, no, no! [The cart crashes into him] ALVIN!! [Alvin smiles nervously; the plane takes off]