Batman & Robin

Alfred:
There is no defeat in death, Master Bruce. Victory comes in defending what we know is right while we still live.

Gossip Gerty:
You must be new in town. In Gotham City, Batman and Robin protect us... even from plants and flowers.

Robin:
I hate to disappoint you but my rubber lips are immune to your charms.

Mr. Freeze:
You're not sending ME to the COOLER!

Robin:
I could have made that jump!

Batman:
And you could have splattered your brains all over the side of the building.

Robin:
You know, in the circus, the Flying Graysons were a team. We had to trust each person to do their jobs. That's what being partners is all about. Sometimes, counting on someone else is the only way you win.

Batman:
You're head wasn't even on the job. All you could think about was Poison Ivy.

Robin:
You just can't stand it! Maybe she wanted me instead of you. I mean, this is you're idea of friendship, isn't it, Bruce? It's your house, it's your rules, it's your way to the highway! It's Batman and Robin, not Robin and Batman, and I'm sick of it!

Batman:
Yes, it's my rules. *My* rules to keep us alive, and if you want to stay in this house, and on this team, you will abide by them!

Robin:
This is no partnership. You're never gonna trust me!

Bruce Wayne:
Well, he's over-eager. He's impulsive. I can't trust him not to get hurt.

Alfred:
Perhaps the truth is you really don't trust anyone.

Bruce Wayne:
Oh, don't tell me you're on his side, again.

Alfred:
Despite all your talents, you are still a novice in the ways of family. Master Dick follows the same star as you but gets there by his own course. You must learn to trust him, for that is the nature of family.

Bruce Wayne:
I trust *you*, Alfred.

Alfred:
But I shan't be here forever.

Freeze:
I'm afraid my condition has left me cold to your pleas of mercy.

Batgirl:
Chicks like you give women a bad name.

Batman:
And you are...?

Batgirl:
Batgirl.

Batman:
That's not very PC. What about Batwoman, or Batperson?

Batgirl:
I found the Batcave.

Robin:
I guess we'll just have to kill her.

Robin:
I need a sign that you've turned over a new leaf.

Ivy:
How about "slippery when wet?"

Poison Ivy:
So many people to kill... so little time.

Ivy:
There's just something about an anatomically correct rubber suit that puts fire in a girl's lips.

Batman:
Why is it that all the beautiful ones are homicidal maniacs? Is it me?

Mr. Freeze:
Tonight, hell freezes over!

Victor Fries/Mr. Freeze:
If I must suffer, humanity will suffer with me.

Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy:
Come with me. My garden needs tending.

Robin:
I want a car, chicks dig the car.

Batman:
This is why Superman works alone.

Robin:
Where's the snowman?

Batgirl:
Maybe he melted.

Batman:
No, he's just hibernating.

Mr. Freeze:
Hello, Sorry about the door, Is the party over?

Mr. Freeze:
I hate it when they talk during the movie.

Robin:
Please be here for me!

Batgirl:
Actually I'm looking for Alfred.

Robin:
Please be looking for me!

Batgirl:
Actually I'm looking for Alfred.

Poison Ivy:
That's not a man. That is a God.

Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy:
I am Nature's arm. Her spirit. Her will. Hell, I am Mother Nature, and the time has come for plants to take back the world so rightfully ours! 'cause it's not nice to fool with Mother Nature.

Pamela Isley/Poison Ivy:
Hello, Jason. I think I've had a change of heart, literally. The animal-plant toxins you dumped on me had a rather unique effect. They replaced my blood with aloe, my skin with chlorophyll, and filled my lips with venom. (Kisses him on the lips) Oh and Jason, one other thing. I probably should've mentioned this earlier. I'm poison.

Poison Ivy:
Some lucky boy's about to hit the honey pot. The winner will receive an evening of my company. I'll bring everything you see here, plus, everything you don't.

Poison Ivy:
It took God seven days to create paradise. Let's see if I can do better.

Poison Ivy:
Batface and Birdbrain showed a remarkable resistance to my love-dust. But no matter. Next time I'll just have to give them a stronger dose. They'll literally be dying for me.

Poison Ivy:
Men, the most absurd of God's creatures. We women give you life, but we can take it away just as easily.

Poison Ivy:
He loves me. He loves me not. He loves me. He loves me ...

Mr. Freeze:
NOT! Surprise, I am your new cell mate. And I'm here to make your life a living hell. Prepare for a bitter harvest. Winter has come at last.

Poison Ivy:
As I told Lady Freeze when I pulled her plug, this is a one woman show.

Mr. Freeze:
I will blanket the city in endless winter. First Gotham, and then the world.

Poison Ivy:
Just what I had in mind. Everything dead on earth, except us. A chance for Mother Nature to start again. Behold, the dawn of a new age. My mutant plants have the strength of the deadliest animals. Once you have frozen mankind, these babies will overrun the globe, and we shall rule them, for we will be the only two people left in the world.

Mr. Freeze:
Adam and Evil!

Poison Ivy:
Kiss me and I'll tell you.

Robin:
Tell me and I'll kiss you.

Robin:
It's the hockey team from hell!

Mr. Freeze:
What killed the dinosaurs? The Ice Age!

Mr. Freeze:
In this universe, there's only one absolute... everything freezes!

Batman:
Who invited you?

Robin:
I was just hanging around.

Batman:
I thought you were gonna stay in the museum. Round up some thugs.

Robin:
How 'bout, "Nice to see ya? Glad you're here to save my life."

Alfred:
I must have dozed off. My sincerest apologies.

Bruce Wayne:
Oh, there's no apology necessary, Alfred. It's the first time it's happened in 30 years.

Mr. Freeze:
Cool party!

Mr. Freeze:
I'll kill you next time!

Mr. Freeze:
Let me guess, Plant Girl? Vine Lady? Huh? Hand over the diamond Garden Gal, or I'll turn you into mulch!

Batman:
You get the ice, I'll get the Ice-man.

Robin:
Nice catch.

Batman:
You break it, you buy it.

Mr. Freeze:
Take two of these, and call me in the morning.

Barbara Wilson:
Partners?

Dick Grayson:
Partners.

Bruce Wayne:
Partners.

Alfred:
We're going to need a bigger cave.

Poison Ivy:
Enough monkey business. We've got work to do.

Bane:
Monkey work.

Bruce Wayne:
Alfred, am I pig headed? Is it always my way or the highway?

Alfred Pennyworth:
Yes, actually. Death and chance stole your parents. But rather than become a victim, you have done everything in your power to control the fates. For what is Batman if not an effort to master the chaos that sweeps our world? An attempt to control death, itself?

Bruce Wayne:
But I can't, can I?

Alfred Pennyworth:
None of us can.

Robin:
I can't believe we were fighting over a bad guy!

Batman:
Bad? Yes. Guy? No.

Robin:
Well I'm totally over her, alright? Positively!

Batman:
Me too! Definitely! [pause] Great stems, though...

Robin:
Buds, too.

Batman:
Yeah, those were nice...

Poison Ivy:
Let me kiss you.

Batman:
[Runs towards Robin] Stop, don't kiss her. The victim at the airport. Toxins introduced through the mouth.

Robin:
What are you talking about?

Batman:
Why do you think she's so desperate to kiss us, I'm betting her lips are poison.

Robin:
Poison kiss? You got some real issues with women, you know that? You just couldn't stand that she was gonna kiss me and not you. You couldn't stand it that something was gonna be mine and not yours, could you?

[Robin pushes Batman and begins an attack, but Batman avoids Robin's attacks and pushes Robin into the vat of slime as Poison Ivy and Bane have the chance to escape]

Poison Ivy:
Exit Bane.

Bane:
Exit.

[Robin gets out of the vat of slime and realizes that this is the last straw as he storms out]

Robin:
Ivy's right. I don't need your help. I'm going solo.

[Commissioner Gordon shows up and questions Batman of Poison Ivy and Bane's escape]

Commissioner Gordon:
What happened? How'd they get away?

[Batman becomes upset of what Robin has said]

[Robin has entered Ivy's lair after she calls him there and meets her in the center]

Poison Ivy:
Hi there.

Robin:
[Walking towards her] Is your thumb the only part of you that's green?

Poison Ivy:
You will just have to find out.

Robin:
I want us to be together, but I want to make sure you're serious about turning over a new leaf. [lays next to her on her throne] I need a sign.

Poison Ivy:
How about "slippery when wet"?

Robin:
Of trust. Tell me your plan.

Poison Ivy:
Kiss me and I'll tell you.

Robin:
Tell me and I'll kiss you.

Poison Ivy:
Freeze has taken the new telescope and turned it into a giant freezing gun. He's about to turn Gotham into an ice cube.

Robin:
[Turns to leave] I've got to stop him.

Poison Ivy:
[Grabs Robin's shoulders and turns him to face her] One kiss...my love...[whispers] for luck.

[Ivy places a hand on Robin's face and they both lean in, Ivy having an evil smirk, and the two share a passionate kiss]

Poison Ivy:
[In mock sadness] Bad luck I'm afraid. Time to die little robin.

Robin:
I hate to disappoint you, but...[peels rubber off his lips and Ivy stares in shock] rubber lips are immune to your charms.

[Ivy glares at Robin before leaping forward and shoving him off her throne, into the pond]

Robin:
Wahh! [Becomes tangled up in vines that try to drown him]

Poison Ivy:
[Leaps from her throne and waves at Robin as she walks off] See ya!

[Ivy walks away. Suddenly, Batman halts Poison Ivy]

Batman:
You're not the only one who can set a trap, Venus.

Poison Ivy:
Sorry. My vines have a "crush" on you.

[Ivy's vines tangle Batman and pull him up to the ceiling]

Poison Ivy:
[Evil Laughing] Gotta go. So many people to kill, so little time!

[Ivy walks away again. Suddenly, Batgirl crashes the sunlight and is ready to fight.]

Batgirl:
You're about to become compost.

[Batgirl starts fighting Poison Ivy]

[Batman, Robin and Batgirl climb up into the chamber, and Mr. Freeze and Bane are not there]

Robin:
No sign of the snowman.

Batgirl:
Maybe he melted.

Batman:
No, he's just hibernating.

[Batman, Robin, and Batgirl shoot the Bat-Grapple into the ceiling and swing into the controller]

Batman:
These heaters will thaw them.

[Batman heat up the scientists. He went past the telescope.]

Batgirl:
I hope you've got about ten million more of those little toys.

Robin:
Eight more minutes and a city full of Gothamites are ice cubes forever.

Batman:
Sunlight could reverse the freezing process.

Batgirl:
Sunrise isn't for five hours.

Batman:
Here.

Robin:
But it's morning in the Congo.

Batman:
If we could relay the sunlight-

Robin:
From the other side of the Equator-

Batgirl:
It'll take the satellites about a minute to re-align, but...damn!

Robin:
Damn? Damn's not good.

Batgirl:
Those targeting mirrors are frozen. The sun beam won't work.

Batman:
Alright, I'll set the telescope. You thaw the mirrors.

[Robin and Batgirl race out of telescope. They begins to thaw the mirrors. Batman get on the main console and types on the keyboard on the world "Targeting". Satellites are tracking through, Back at Observatory. Robin and Batgirl continues to thaw the mirrors. The digital clock reads "11:
53" to "11:54", Batman aims the telescope. Suddenly, Mr. Freeze surprises Batman.]

Mr. Freeze:
Tonight's forecast...a freeze is coming!

[Freeze grabs Batman and hurls the caped crusader up over his head onto the telescope barrel, using his free hand to yank the telescope control joystick. The telescope tilts sharply downward.]

[Batgirl disables Mr. Freeze's freeze-ray]

Robin:
You're pretty good at this, little girl.

Batgirl:
Well, watch and learn, little boy.

[After Poison Ivy defeated by Batgirl, Batman and Robin meet up with Batgirl]

Robin:
Freeze is gonna ice the city!

Batman:
I know. And you are...

Batgirl:
Batgirl.

Batman:
That's not very PC. What about Batperson, or Batwoman?

Batgirl:
Bruce, it's me, Barbara. I found a Batcave.

Robin:
We gotta get those locks changed.

Batman:
She knows who we are.

Robin:
I guess we'll just have to kill her.

Batman:
Yep. We'll kill her later, we'll have work to do. Come on.

[Batman, Robin and Batgirl exit Ivy's lair and went after Mr. Freeze and Bane.]

Batman / Bruce Wayne:
Vengeance isn't true power. Anyone can take a life. Giving life is true power, the power you once had.

Batman / Bruce Wayne:
Hey Freeze, the heat is on!!

Batman / Bruce Wayne:
Why are all the beautiful ones homicidal maniacs? Is it me?

Alfred Pennyworth:
I'll cancel the pizzas!

Poison Ivy / Dr. Pamela Isley:
Sorry, my vines have a crush on you!

Poison Ivy / Dr. Pamela Isley:
I'm a lover not a fighter, which is why every Poison Ivy action figure comes with him! [gestures to Bane]

Poison Ivy / Dr. Pamela Isley:
Kiss me and I'll tell you.

Poison Ivy / Dr. Pamela Isley:
One kiss...my love...for luck.

Mr. Freeze / Dr. Victor Fries:
Freeze in hell, Batman!

Mr. Freeze / Dr. Victor Fries:
Freeze well.

Mr. Freeze / Dr. Victor Fries:
Let's kick some ice!

Mr. Freeze / Dr. Victor Fries:
Grab the gem! Kill the heroes! Yes! Yes! Kill them!

Mr. Freeze / Dr. Victor Fries:
The Ice Man cometh!

Mr. Freeze / Dr. Victor Fries:
Allow me to break the ice. My name is Freeze. Learn it well, for it is the chilling sound of your doom!

Mr. Freeze / Dr. Victor Fries:
Can you feel it coming? The icy cold of space. At 30,000 feet, your heart will freeze and be no more.

Mr. Freeze / Dr. Victor Fries:
Alright everyone! Chill.

Mr. Freeze / Dr. Victor Fries:
No matter what they tell you, Mr. Bane, it is the size of your gun that counts.

Mr. Freeze / Dr. Victor Fries:
I hate uninvited guests.

Mr. Freeze / Dr. Victor Fries:
If revenge is a dish best served cold, then put on your Sunday finest: It's time to feast!

Mr. Freeze / Dr. Victor Fries:
[freezes Robin] Stay cool, Birdboy.

Mr. Freeze / Dr. Victor Fries:
Dare to be cold, Batman?

Mr. Freeze / Dr. Victor Fries:
Tonight's forecast: A Freeze is coming!

Mr. Freeze / Dr. Victor Fries:
After you're frozen, your icy tomb will plummet back to Gotham.

Mr. Freeze / Dr. Victor Fries:
A laundry service that delivers. Wow!

Mr. Freeze / Dr. Victor Fries:
I hope Mr. Bane can swim.