OK, let me get something straight: This is a JOURNAL, not a diary. I know what it says on the cover, but when Mom went out to buy this thing I SPECIFICALLY told her to get one that didn't say "diary" on it. Great. All I need is some jerk to catch me carrying this book around and get the wrong idea.
OK, first of all, let me get something straight, this is a journal, not a diary. Yeah, I know what it says on the cover, but when my mom went out to buy this thing, I specifically told her not to buy the thing that says "diary" on it. This just proves that Mom doesn't understand anything about kids my age.
Sissy! [punches Greg]
The only reason why I agreed to write in this thing, is because one day, when I'm rich and famous, I'll have better things to do than answer people's stupid questions all day long.
Gregory! Tell us about your childhood!
Were you always so smart and handsome?
Here's my journal. Now shoo, shoo.
That's our boy up there.
Why did I ever say no to him?
Rowley, if you had to say what you were ranked in terms of popularity from 1 to 200, where would you put yourself?
Is 200 good or bad?
I'd say you're somewhere around the 154 mark. I'd put myself around number 19 or 20. I might even have a shot at the top spot by the end of the year. If things will go the way I think they will.
Well, who's at the bottom?
Hey, guys! You wanna see my secret freckle? [lifts up his shirt]
Greg & Rowley:
[narrating] Fregley, sent home for hygiene issues at least once a month.
Check it out. It's got a hair in it!
It all starts in middle school, y'know. You're not a kid anymore, the coddling's stopped. Kids aren't separated by intelligence. The weak are picked on. The girls you've known since kindergarten won't even talk to you anymore.
Okay, well it sounds like you've got it all figured out, so go back to your book.
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