I came here when I was fourteen, with a life expectancy of thirteen. I was bounced around from home to home until this... became my home. Guys would line up outside that door to fight me. They whooped my skinny ass so much I started to enjoy it. Until one winter, I grew eight inches, gained sixty pounds, punched a guy so hard he couldn't move his arm to tap out. Then when the Joes came recruiting to the hood, I'd already beaten down half of it. I became a Joe to serve. In the field. So if we're fighting uphill, we take the hill.
My dad could see me now...
What are you talking about?
You wouldn't believe it.
Third generation military. He desperately wanted a fourth. My mom had me.
Well he must be really proud of you then.
He didn't believe in female soldiers. I finally asked him why. He said he didn't want to put his life in the hands of a woman. I enlisted the next day. Spent the next seven years trying to outrank him so he'd have to salute me.
Did it work?
He died before I got the chance.
You know, they say this is a thankless job. But yesterday, I hung out with Bono. My new secret service; they want to burn the constitution. Literally. Do you know my favorite bit? I get to blow stuff up.
I bet that endears you to the people.
Well that's the thing. Your approval ratings climbed nine points. Apparently, America wants someone who looks like you but acts like me.
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