Hunt for Red October

Jeffrey Pelt:
Mr. Ambassador, you have nearly a hundred naval vessels operating in the North Atlantic right now. Your aircraft has dropped enough sonar buoys so that a man could walk from Greenland to Iceland to Scotland without getting his feet wet. Now, shall we dispense with the bull?

Ambassador Lysenko:
You make your point as delicately as ever, Mr. Pelt.

Helicopter Pilot:
Fuel status says we turn back now.

Jack Ryan:
Wait a minute. Fuel status? You have a reserve, don't you?

Helicopter Pilot:
Yes, sir. I've got a ten minute reserve... but I'm not allowed to invade that except in time of war.

Jack Ryan:
Listen, mister, if you don't get me on board that goddamn submarine, I might just have a war for you! You got me? Now you have ten more minutes' worth of fuel, we stay here ten more minutes!

Capt. Vasili Borodin:
I will live in Montana. And I will marry a round American woman and raise rabbits, and she will cook them for me. And I will have a pickup truck... maybe even a "recreational vehicle." And drive from state to state. Do they let you do that?

Captain Ramius:
I suppose.

Capt. Vasili Borodin:
No papers?

Captain Ramius:
No papers, state to state.

Capt. Vasili Borodin:
Well then, in winter I will live in... Arizona. Actually, I think I will need two wives.

Captain Ramius:
Oh, at least.

Watson:
Y'know, I seen me a mermaid once. I even seen me a shark eat an octopus. But I ain't never seen no phantom Russian submarine.

Capt. Bart Mancuso:
My Morse is so rusty, I could be sending him dimensions on playmate of the month.

Captain Ramius:
We will pass through the American patrols, past their sonar nets, and lay off their largest city, and listen to their rock and roll... while we conduct missile drills.

Jeffrey Pelt:
It would be well for your government to consider that having your ships and ours, your aircraft and ours, in such proximity... is inherently DANGEROUS. Wars have begun that way, Mr. Ambassador.

Captain Davenport:
What's he going to do, sail into New York, pop the hatch, and say "Here I am"?

Jack Ryan:
It might be just that simple, yes.

Captain Ramius:
You're afraid of our fleet. Well, you should be. Personally, I'd give us one chance in three. More tea anyone?

Captain Ramius:
Hey, Ryan, be careful what you shoot at. Most things in here don't react too well to bullets.

Jack Ryan:
Right.

Jack Ryan:
*I* have to be careful what *I* shoot at?

Captain Ramius:
"... and the sea will grant each man new hope, as sleep brings dreams of home." Christopher Columbus.

Jack Ryan:
Welcome to the New World, sir.

Admiral Josh Painter:
This business will get out of control. It will get out of control and we'll be lucky to live through it.

Captain Ramius:
When he reached the New World, Cortez burned his ships. As a result his men were well motivated.

Captain Ramius:
I miss the peace of fishing like when I was a boy. Forty years I've been at sea. A war at sea. A war with no battles, no monuments... only casualties. I widowed her the day I married her. My wife died while I was at sea, you know.

Seaman Jones:
Conn, sonar! Crazy Ivan!

Capt. Bart Mancuso:
All stop! Quick quiet!

Beaumont:
What's goin' on?

Seaman Jones:
Russian captains sometime turn suddenly to see if anyone's behind them. We call it "Crazy Ivan." The only thing you can do is go dead. Shut everything down and make like a hole in the water.

Beaumont:
So what's the catch?

Seaman Jones:
The catch is, a boat this big doesn't exactly stop on a dime... and if we're too close, we'll drift right into the back of him.

Capt. Bart Mancuso:
The hard part about playing chicken is knowin' when to flinch.

Skip Tyler:
When I was twelve, I helped my daddy build a bomb shelter in our basement because some fool parked a dozen warheads 90 miles off the coast of Florida. Well, this thing could park a coupla hundred warheads off Washington and New York and no one would know anything about it till it was all over.

Captain Ramius:
A great day comrades, we sail into history!

Bill Steiner:
Hey I think someone just shot a torpedo at us!

Capt. Bart Mancuso:
No sh*t, Buckwheat, now get the hell out of here!

Captain Ramius:
It reminds me of the heady days of Sputnik and Yuri Gagarin when the world trembled at the sound of our rockets. Now they will tremble again - at the sound of our silence. The order is: engage the silent drive.

Jeffrey Pelt:
Listen, I'm a politician which means I'm a cheat and a liar, and when I'm not kissing babies I'm stealing their lollipops. But it also means I keep my options open.

Jeffrey Pelt:
You slammed the door on the General pretty hard, didn't you?

Jack Ryan:
That was not my intention.

Jeffrey Pelt:
Oh, yes, it was! He was patronizing you, and you stomped on him! And in my opinion, he deserved it!

Adm. Painter:
What's his plan?

Jack Ryan:
His plan?

Adm. Painter:
Russians don't take a dump, son, without a plan.

Captain Tupolev:
We're going to kill a friend, Yvgeni. We're going to kill Raimus.

Lieutenant Commander Thompson - USS Dallas:
Come on, Big D. Fly!

Admiral James Greer:
Jesus! You look like hell!

Capt. Bart Mancuso:
Central Intelligence Agency... Now, there's a contradiction in terms.

Jack Ryan:
I'm not an agent, I just write books for the CIA.

Captain Davenport:
They're pinging away with their active sonar like they're looking for something, but nobody's listening.

Jack Ryan:
What do you mean?

Captain Davenport:
Well, they're moving at almost forty knots. At that speed, they could run right over my daughter's stereo and not hear it.

Kamarov:
Stop pissing, Yuri. Give me a stopwatch and a map, and I'll fly the Alps in a plane with no windows.

Yuri (Diving Officer):
If the map is accurate enough.

Andrei Amalric:
You arrogant ass. You've killed *us*!

Capt. Vasili Borodin:
I would like to have seen Montana.

Admiral James Greer:
Now Commander... that torpedo did NOT self-destruct. You heard it hit the hull, and I... was never here.

Jeffrey Pelt:
I can't ask any of these characters to go. One, they don't believe in it. Two, they'd never stake their reputation on a hunch. Whereas you...

Jack Ryan:
...are expendable.

Jeffrey Pelt:
Something like that.

Jack Ryan:
Next time, Jack, write a goddamn memo.

Navigator C-2A:
What's the matter Commander? You don't like flying, huh? Aw, this is nothing! You should've been with us five, six months ago! Whoa! You talk about puke! We ran into a hailstorm over the Sea of Japan. Everybody's retching their guts out! The pilot shot his lunch all over the windshield, and I barfed on the radio! And it wasn't that lightweight stuff either, it was that chunky industrial weight puke!

Navigator C-2A:
Hey, you want a bite?

Jack Ryan:
Jack, next time you get a bright idea just put it in a memo!

Dr. Petrov:
Well if you like borsch perhaps, but I've eaten better in an oily GALLEY. My wife said to the waiter, "where did this man learn to cook? AFGHANISTAN? So then we went on to the Bolshoi ballet, to see this new girl Gizelle. Well, you remember how BEAUTIFUL she was! Well, she just married a factory manager and...

Capt. Bart Mancuso:
You, you speak English?

Capt. Bart Mancuso:
Get your butt over here!

Captain Ramius:
Re-verify our range to target... one ping only.

Capt. Vasili Borodin:
Captain, I - I - I just...

Captain Ramius:
Give me aping, Vasili. One ping only, please.

Capt. Vasili Borodin:
Aye, Captain.

Jack Ryan:
Is there a way you could get me on board the Dallas?

Admiral Josh Painter:
What the hell for?

Jack Ryan:
I think that Captain Mancuso has found the Red October.

Admiral Josh Painter:
You think he's crazy?

Captain Davenport:
Certifiable. And no matter what his credentials, I don't care for him wearing the uniform.

Admiral Josh Painter:
You see that ring on his finger? The Academy, Class of '72. A Marine.

Captain Davenport:
You're kidding! How did you...

Admiral Josh Painter:
Greer told me. Summer of his third year, he and his squad went down in a chopper accident in the Med. Bad - pilot, crew killed. That kid spent ten months in traction, another year learning to walk again. Did his fourth year from the hospital. Now it's up to you, Charlie, but you might consider cuttin' the kid a little slack.

Jack Ryan:
Has he made any Crazy Ivans?

Capt. Bart Mancuso:
What difference does that make?

Jack Ryan:
Because his next one is going to be to starboard.

Capt. Bart Mancuso:
Why? Because his last was to port?

Jack Ryan:
No. Because he always goes to starboard in the bottom half of the hour.

Captain Ramius:
There's one thing you haven't yet asked me: why?

Jack Ryan:
Well, I thought you would tell me when you felt ready.

Captain Ramius:
Well, there are those who believe that we should attack the United States first. Settle everything in one moment. Red October was built for that purpose.

Watson:
Seaman Jones here is into music in a big way, and he views this whole boat as his own personal, private stereo set. Well, one day he's got this piece of Pavarotti...

Seaman Jones:
It was Paganini.

Watson:
Whatever.

Seaman Jones:
It was Paganini.

Watson:
Look, this is my story, okay?

Seaman Jones:
Then tell it right, COB. Pavarotti is a tenor, Paganini was a composer.

Watson:
So anyway, he's got this music out in the water, and he's listening to it on his headsets, and he's just happy as a clam. And then all hell breaks loose. See, there's this whole slew of boats out in the water...

Seaman Jones:
Including one WAY out at Pearl!

Watson:
Including one way the hell out at Pearl. All of a sudden, they start hearing, Pavarotti...

Beaumont:
Pavarotti!

Watson:
Coming up their asses!

Capt. Bart Mancuso:
All back full.

Lt. Cmdr. Thompson:
Captain...

Capt. Bart Mancuso:
I said, all back full!

Lt. Cmdr. Thompson:
Back full, aye.

Seaman Jones:
Captain, we're cavitating, he can hear us!

Capt. Bart Mancuso:
Conn, aye. All right, Ryan, we just unzipped our fly. Mr. Thompson! Open the outer doors, firing point procedures. Now if that bastard so much as twitches, I'm going to blow him straight to Mars.

Jack Ryan:
Where are we going, anyway?

Admiral James Greer:
Briefing for Jeffrey Pelt, the President's National Security Advisor. Most of the Joint Chiefs will be there, along with a few other people.

Jack Ryan:
Who's giving the briefing?

Admiral James Greer:
You are.