Muppets From Space

Muppets From Space

The film that answers the immortal question: what species is Gonzo? Kermit the Frog's curly-nosed friend feels alone in the world. When his breakfast cereal starts spelling out questions and he hears voices, Gonzo is convinced he must be from outer space, and his alien brothers are coming to earth. Of course, there are evil scientists (led by Jeffrey Tambor) who kidnap Gonzo to learn his secrets (like "What do you do with a nose like that?"). The usual brand of merriment from the gang is in good order, especially in the opening scene when the Muppets start the morning under one roof. It's not as memorable as earlier films, but nevertheless the joy and sly humor will warm most souls age 5 and up. Human cameos include Ray Liotta, Rob Schneider, Josh Charles, Andie MacDowell, David Arquette, and F. Murray Abraham (as Noah, no less). --Doug Thomas

Director(s): Tim Hill
Production: Columbia Pictures
  1 nomination.
 
IMDB:
6.3
Rotten Tomatoes:
63%
G
Year:
1999
87
Website
4,452 Views

[Miss Piggy runs past Statler and Waldorf]

Statler:
Is breakfast over?

Waldorf:
No, why?

Statler:
Because I think the bacon just ran out.

Pepe:
[comes to the table] The raspberry flap overs will be out in a moment.

Robin:
Hey, Uncle Kermit, what will you do now that you're on vacation?

Kermit:
Well, Robin, once I get those house painters started, l'm gonna kick back and relax.

Pepe:
Kermit? When will you fix the oven, okay?

Kermit:
[confused] What's wrong with the oven? [An explosion is heard in the kitchen. Everyone on the table react to that sound.]

Pepe:
That.

Swedish Chef:
Yurski burski popovers kaboofed!

Kermit:
Yeah... I'll put it on the top of my list...

Pepe:
There is a menu correction, okay? We will now be serving bologna sandwiches. [everyone makes disappointed sounds. Swedish Chef says something to Pepe] But no bread. [Everyone makes a disgusted noise and leaves the table]

[Kermit sees Gonzo coming downstairs looking dejected]

Kermit:
Hey, Gonzo, aren't you performing at that Bar Mitzvah today?

Gonzo:
Nah. Electric Mayhem's covering for me.

Kermit:
[concerned] But, Gonzo, you never miss the chance to get shot out of a cannon. Something wrong?

Gonzo:
No. [beat] It's just that I'm sick and tired of being a one-of-a-kind freak, that's all.

Kermit:
Gonzo, you are 'not a one-of-a-kind freak! You're a... [falters]

Gonzo:
[annoyed] A whatever?

Kermit:
Well... yeah!

Gonzo:
You see?! See what I mean? I don't even know where I came from, or who I am!

Clifford:
Yo, Kerm.

Kermit:
Hmm?

Clifford:
You weren't expecting some house painters, were you?

Kermit:
Yeah, why?

Clifford:
They're just driving away.

Kermit:
What?!

Clifford:
Animal bit one of them!

Kermit:
Oh no! [The car engine of the house painters truck starts] Wait, guys! Don't let them go! [turns to Gonzo] You know what I think you are, Gonzo?

Gonzo:
What?

Kermit:
Distinct. [turns to run to the door to try and stop the painters] Wait, guys! He didn't mean it! He's just a musician!

Animal:
Musician! Musician! Musician! [Gonzo looks over at photos of the Muppets with their respective family members, before coming to photo of himself, alone]

Gonzo:
[depressed] Distinct, huh? More like extinct... [pours the alphabet cereal in the bowl, but spills a little bit on the table] Oops. [looks at the letters spinning around, then making the words, saying, "Watch The Sky"] "Watch the sky"? Hey! Hey! Rizzo, come here. I think my Kap'n Alphabet is sending me a message.

Rizzo:
[While holding a plate with bologna] I know what you mean. I had some guacamole and it's still taking to me.

Gonzo:
No. No. Really. Look. Look. I'm not kidding. [looking at the letter cereals] It was there just a second ago. I swear, Rizzo. It said, "Watch the sky."

Rizzo:
Are you sure it didn't say "You need help?"

Gonzo:
But, but...

Rizzo:
Maybe you and your cereal would like to be alone. [takes the plate of ] Oh, hey! ? My bologna has a first name, it's O-S-C-A-R...?

Gonzo:
[he pours the cereal the bowl with letters, then grabbing a telescope] Cool. Huh? [he looks at the letters, then making the words, saying, "R U There"] "Are you there?" [calling out] RIZZOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Miss Piggy:
[to the agents taking Gonzo and Rizzo away] Hey, studmuffin, hold it!

Agent Barker:
[to the other agent] I'll deal with her.

Miss Piggy:
[sarcastically] Oh, ha-ha you'll deal with moi? Look, chumpo, I'm just trying to get a story okay.

Agent Barker:
How about this story? It's about a big bad wolf and a little pig.

Miss Piggy:
No, that's three pigs okay.

Agent Barker:
[menacingly] Not in this version.

Miss Piggy:
[frowns] Hey, Wait a minute, you're not part of an alien-protection agency! Who are you? Where are you taking Gonzo?! [He grabs her arm] hey! [A stand off between Miss Piggy and Agent Barker] Hi-yah!

Agent Barker:
I'm impressed! [Knocks down a standing post] Black belt, third degree.

Miss Piggy:
Hi-yah! [Knocks down wooden stand] Platinum belt, with an unlimited line of credit.

Agent Barker:
[grins] I like this party!

Miss Piggy:
Oh, ahh, tough guy, tough guy, ha-ha!! Come on, show me, show me! Oh, look, Cindy Crawford.

Agent Barker:
Huh?

Miss Piggy:
Hi-yah! [She hits him in the stomach] ha-ha-ha!

Agent Barker:
[chuckles] Where have you been all my life?

Miss Piggy:
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!! [They start dancing around until Agent Barker punches her in the face] Is that all you got?! [Miss Piggy keeps saying it after each punch In the face until she falls towards him and Agent Barker grabs her head in a headlock and gives her a noogie] Not the noogie! HI!!!! [She punches him in the crotch and then he lets her go] Eh!

Agent Barker:
Ooh! [He falls on his knees] Oooooooooooooooh! [He tumbles to the ground]

Miss Piggy:
AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!! MAMA!!!!!!

Dr. Van Neuter:
Let's see here... Have you ever experienced any achiness in your tentacles?

Gonzo:
I don't have tentacles!

Dr. Van Neuter:
Good, no achy tentacles, good... Head ever come off?

Gonzo:
No, I don't think so.

Dr. Van Neuter:
Good, good, good. Any gingivitis?

Gonzo:
No.

Dr. Van Neuter:
Great. What about problems with that beaky thing you've got there? Itching, swelling, flaking?

Gonzo:
Well, some flaking a couple years ago-

Dr. Van Neuter:
[throws away clipboard] Oh, who cares? It's showtime! Here we go.

Gonzo:
Oh, brother.

Dr. Van Neuter:
Excellent, excellent.

Gonzo:
What's that thing?

Dr. Van Neuter:
I don't know. Here we go. Here we go. Just stay like that.

Gonzo:
Okay.

Pepe:
This way.

Miss Piggy:
Whose bright idea was this, anyway?

Fozzie:
Which way, Kermit?

Pepe:
Kermin! Kermin! This way.

Miss Piggy:
I can't breathe!

Pepe:
Come on, Kermin!

Dr. Van Neuter:
Okay. Here we go.

Gonzo:
Wait, wait.

Dr. Van Neuter:
What is it?

Gonzo:
Are you sure this is covered by my HMO?

Dr. Van Neuter:
Good question. I'll check.

Rizzo:
Gonzo.

Gonzo:
Rizzo. You're alive. Where have you been?

Rizzo:
You don't want to know. Sit tight while I chew through these straps.

Gonzo:
Yeah, yeah.

Rizzo:
Okay.

Dr. Van Neuter:
Good news. You're covered with a $10 co-pay. Okay, hold still. And remember, if you experience any unpleasantness, please let me know. I'd hate to miss it.

Rizzo:
Do you mind?

Dr. Van Neuter:
Excuse me. Wait! Oh, good Lord! A rat! I hate rats!

Bubba:
Then today ain't your lucky day, Doc.

Rat #1:
Ready for an operation?

Rat #2:
A little experiment.

Pepe:
Forward, Piggy. Forward.

Kermit:
Doctor.

Pepe:
Doctor.

Kermit:
Doctor.

Pepe:
Doctor.

Kermit:
Just a couple of doctors.

Pepe:
Doctors in the hallway. That was close.

Kermit:
To the right, Fozzie.

Pepe:
Forward, Piggy. Too fast, too fast. The door. Stop!

Kermit:
What in the world?

Singer:
This is big, general. I think we should notify the president.

General Luft:
I'll be the judge of that.

Singer:
As always, sir.

Dr. Van Neuter:
No, don't tickle me!

Pepe:
What do we do?

Miss Piggy:
Will you please get me out of here?

Dr. Van Neuter:
No, no, no! I can't breathe!

Gonzo:
Hey, guys. Quick, get me out of here!

Singer:
Today, sir... ...we must think with a big mind. Behold. Irrefutable evidence of extraterrestrial life.

Dr. Van Neuter:
Release me...

Singer:
This looks worse than it is, general. Obviously, the...

Dr. Van Neuter:
Get off of me, you vermin!

Singer:
The alien is loose in the building. But not to worry, because...

General Luft:
Don't bother. You're terminated.

Singer:
When you say "terminated"...

General Luft:
YOU NEED HELP, SINGER! FIND SOME!

Agent Rentro:
Well, how'd that go for you, then? Okay?


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