Carl, Carl! Wait, what are you doing?
I'm running... trying to gain my wife back!
Carl... you have it all wrong. I'm trying to steal your wife. All I am is that loveable f***-up that everyone can help. You are just the loveable guy that is lucky for having a wife like Molly.
I got news for you, Dupree. You're not that loveable.
[during his job interview] I'm a people person, very responsible. I absolutely insist on enjoying life. Not so task-oriented. Not a work horse. If you're looking for a Clydesdale, I'm probably not your man. Like I don't live to work, it's more the other way around. I work to live. Incidentally, what's your policy on Columbus Day?
Really? The guy discovered the new world. I'm afraid to even ask about Victory Over Japan Day.
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